Feeling bad about a daycare letter.

[daycaremommv]

My husband came home with this letter over my daycare's Christmas break, and I have been sitting on it ever since. Because, honestly I am angry at her for even writing this! We have been switching days a few times now and she has not said a word, and then she writes this right before her holiday...Which I might add was not for free, this was paid time....

It's not that she was rude about it really, I just don't like that if we don't do things exactly so as she wants, she writes us a reminder. Isn't home daycare supposed to be about flexibility? After all she only takes care of 2 (including mine) children, and her own son.

Would you do anything about the letter? If so what?

What do daycare providers think?

December 22, 2014


___________________

Re: Unscheduled Daycare Days

I am writing to remind you of the terms of your part time care contract with ___________ daycare It is my understanding that you had requested care for your son on Monday, Wednesday and Friday of each week. From 1- 4:30pm.

Today you had requested care for Tuesday December 23, 2014, and though for the most part I am able to accommodate changes within your scheduled hours with 24 hours notice, I must remind you that I do reserve the right to deny schedule changes based on availability.

Your contract states this:

“Each family has their own individual contracted hours. If at any time you need me to care for your child outside of your regular contacted hours, I ask that you make this inquiry with a minimum of 24 hours notice. If I agree to the proposed time change you will be charged $5.00 per 30 minutes of care outside of the times noted above.

Please Note: The aforementioned fees are applicable even while the client is still within the regular 10 hour time frame constituting a full day, and these are due at drop off)

If you need to permanently change your contracted hours you must inform me in writing with a minimum of 14 calendar days of notice.”

If your family wishes to add an extra day to your part time schedule on a permanent basis, you may do so at a cost of $50 per additional day added each week, and these charges will be paid in advance along with your monthly fees. For example if you wish to add on one extra day per week, your new fees $650.00/month.

The other alternative is to pay for a full time space to allow you the flexibility you may need. As a reminder full time spaces are available at a cost of $650.00/month for care Monday to Friday, at agreed upon times up to 10 hours per day.

Thank you so much for your understanding, and attention to this matter.

___________________ of __________________

[CrazyEight]

Honestly, all she is doing is reminding you of the contract YOU signed. Her letter was professional and to-the-point, and as you say you have switched days a few times now, she has already proven to be accommodating. I don't mean to be rude, but if you dislike the contract, maybe it is time to look somewhere else. It shouldn't matter how few children she is caring for - what if she has had an enquiry for an additional child or children? Daycare providers can only have a certain number of children in care at once. If you are constantly changing your days, then your provider can't count on a space being open for an additional child.

I'm sorry, but I don't see anything rude or inconsiderate about this letter at all. She's not changing the contract or springing anything on you, she is reminding you about a contract that you both already agreed to. Her thinking was probably, it's happened a few times, it's a New Year, it's time to enforce rules that are there for a reason, and that are her prerogative to make.

[Lou]

Yeah, I'm sorry but I agree with your provider as well. It is her business, and it is a contract that you signed. Flexibility is a positive of a home daycare, but if this is something that she is NOT flexible about then this is why you are receiving this reminder. Switching up the days at random would not work in my home either...other things I am not flexible about are the Fee Schedule, Nap Time and my Illness Policy. Your provider works hard, and makes a plan (crafts, activities, outings, etc) according to the number of children she has in attendance every day, and grocery shops week to week depending on attendance.
And this is her business, and you signed the contract- she is not working for you, you are using her business. Just curious as to why you signed the contract if you didn't intend on following her policies? Not trying to sound rude, just confused as to why you are upset.

[daycaremommv]

I am upset, because everything is letters and reminders with her. I don't know, she can never seem to let anything go, it always has to be right on point.

[Lou]

So, why not just follow the policies that you signed off on? I get that you're feeling like you just keep on receiving letters and it's getting you down, but how must she feel if she feels the need to continuously send you formal reminders of every day policies? All of my clients receive the same expectations. No one is more special then the next. I have a policy handbook, and if a parent forgets, I remind, but they are usually respectful enough to clarify the policies with me before assuming something is ok. I have only ever had one client who continuously disregarded my policies, and that business relationship unfortunately ended with me terminating their services.
Apart from the reminders, is she friendly? Does your child have a great time, doing fun things in her home? Is your child loved, well cared for in a safe home away from home?

[daycaremommv]

He is taken care of well, she is rarely closed unless with advanced notice. But she is not friendly in that sense all she talks about is his progress, etc. Really impersonal. My son has special needs, so she takes a lot of time to take care of him...


I just can't shake that she seems all business. I am not looking to be friends, but it would be nice not just to be hi bye at her door.

[Wonderwiper]

Honestly, I think you and her are not a good fit. If she runs a formal business and you were hoping for something a bit more friendly it will never work. You will always feel she is cold and she will feel like she is always nagging you to follow the rules you agreed to.

Each of us run our daycares differently. Shop around and find someone who better fits your needs. You each have different expectations. You will find someone who fits better with what you were hoping for!

[mattsmom]

Totally agree with caregiver. If you signed a contract that you are needing certain days/hours then that is only what she is contracted to give you. When we have part time children, it is common for us to contract other children to fill the other days that you aren't contracted for. So to expect her to just accept your changes without notice and without her saying something about it, is not fair to her at all.

It is what you agreed to and she is well within her right to ask you to stick with what was agreed to. And she is acting business like because it is her business!!! We don't do this just for the fun of it, this is our job. We need to make sure contracts are complied with and be able to stand up for ourselves when it comes to anything to do with the business.

[Rachael]

I am upset, because everything is letters and reminders with her. I don't know, she can never seem to let anything go, it always has to be right on point.

LMAO - Are you freaking kidding me? Sorry to be blunt but you are the sort of client most of us would give notice to.

So she's written you a letter which isn't rude, reminding you about the contract you signed and committed to because you seem to constantly ignore it to suit yourself, and you have the nerve to feel offended by her actions? You feel she's rude and inflexible because she isn't prepared to endlessly switch her personal time around to suit you ?

LOL I've heard it all now! What about how rude you are being by signing for one service and demanding another? What about the level of disrespect you are showing her when you have zero consideration for her business, her contract, her time when she's not contracted to be available to her? You treat her appallingly and then you expect her to be chatty and friendly and have conversations that buddies would have?

Seriously? You treat someone that way and you have the nerve to moan about your hurt feelings when you have been completely taking advantage of her. The irony of that has to seriously burn.

You have an agreement with the carer. By your own admission, she is delivering fully on the service she is meant to provide - your child is well cared for, she is reliable, professional with updates, she takes a lot of time to care for your child's special needs.

In return, you are messing around by switching out days on her, expecting her to ignore the terms you agreed to, moaning that she's not friendly because she doesn't chat about non-day care related topics.

Your day care provider is not interested in being your friend. You are a client - a business arrangement not a friend. She is being beyond reasonable. Why should she "let it go" when one of her customers is taking advantage? Why would she continually put up with you expecting short notice changes to her schedule?

No, in home day care is not about flexibility for parents to bend the agreement they made. It's funny how it's always problem parents who define "flexible care" as wholly a situation to their sole advantage and never the benefit for the carer. In-home care is not a license to be an ass to your carer. It's about a smaller intimate environment of care with no issues of ever changing staff. And it seems you have an excellent carer.

If you aren't able to follow the terms you agreed to, perhaps you need to find a less formal, casual carer. I think both sides would be much happier.

[mickyc]

I agree with everyone on this matter. You are not friends, it is her business and she is trying to not cause an altercation. You signed the agreement so you need to follow it.

I had a part-time family as well. They were all over the place and it drove me nuts. I like to plan an obviously your provider does as well. I changed my policy so that any days that were original booked were automatically paid and any days switched were considered additional days. After a few weeks of paying full-time rate the family quit switching days. It wasn't too much longer until they left. I enjoyed the family very much but sometimes think that when you are friendly with a family sometimes they begin to try and take advantage.

I am sorry you feel this way but you need to follow your own schedule and then there wont be any issues or alternatively pay for a full-time spot and then you can pick and choose the days your child attends..