What made me smile today

[5 Little Monkeys]

haha, thanks!! Sometimes I think we would be great parents and than other times I think I'm okay being childless lol. It's a really tough decision for me and I turn 29 tomorrow so I feel pressure to decide soon

We've actually gone to a specialist but they are 2 hours from us. We had 4 or 5 different appointments with them but have only seen the dr once. She CONSTANTLY reschedules. As you all know, we don't really have that luxury in this job to take days off whenever we need. I felt terrible inconveniencing the parents that many times (some took days off and than I ended up staying open and closing another day) and knew that I couldn't keep doing that. We had a follow up appointment scheduled for Feb and she rescheduled back in Dec/early Jan maybe? We decided than that we could no longer see her as both of us do not have jobs that allow us to switch days off constantly.

We are still at the "if it happens, it happens" stage. I am PRETTY sure it won't happen naturally but who knows really. I will work with my family doctor and am going to see a doctor in my city, that many people have had success with getting pregnant, when I'm ready. She is a chinese doctor and uses traditional chinese medicine to my knowledge.

I am open to adoption (once we fully decide that is what we want) but my husband is still unsure on that route.

I don't have a huge desire one way or another so I find it very stressful at times because I feel I should have made a decision by now. We have discussed it and we both say we are okay with not having children....but than other days we are like "wouldn't it be nice to xxx with our child". I just don't want to turn 50 and than regret not having children you know?

Sorry for my ramble...