Argh Husbands!

[JennJubie]

Wow. I would be super pissed. I must have hit the jack pot, because my husband takes our kids out on a regular basis to give me alone time. Loads and unloads dishwasher, does laundry, cooks dinner. Right from the start I told him I expected him to. We both work equally as hard, and he gets done work before I do, so he starts the housework. Perhaps he's just doing it out of the goodness of his heart, or perhaps he's trying to avoid the snarling beast that I become if I'm left to do everything.

[Fun&care]

You need to pick a fight. Really, you do. I learned the hard way...I am actually on the edge of a burnout. Exhausted doesnt even cover it. A large part of why or how I got here (though there are many other reasons) was because I did everything, all the time. A few weeks ago it all came to a head, it came to the point of almost costing our marriage, but my husband finally has picked up his feet and he is helping out a lot more. but years and years of overwork has taken its toll and I've been recently diagnosed with adrenal fatigue.

Don't wait until it takes its toll on your health! He needs to get real and start helping out ASAP, and you need to pick as many fights as it takes for him to get on board! If you aren't speaking up you are essentially teaching him that his behavior is ok.

[torontokids]

Looking at the lists I think its because I have a lot of every day stuff to do whereas he has a lot more "as needed" tasks like shoveling.

[AcornsFalling]

My husband is like yours. Clueless about what needs to be done. Over 15 years of being together I have learned that stewing and fuming, he won't notice. Now when I want something done, I ask and usually he is happy to help. It's those day to day chores that he doesn't realize need to be done. So I tell him I need help, and if he doesn't get up and help me he will hear about it!