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Thread: Toy Hog

  1. #1
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    Toy Hog

    I have a 3 yr old girl in my care that is a toy hog. She is usually the first one here in the morning, she grabs one of the toy backpacks, and puts all her favourite toys in it, then she either puts it on her back all day, or she keeps it right beside her. She says she is "playing with them", but she's not, she is just preventing the other kids from playing with them. I'm I making an issue of this, should I just allow her to do this? she gets really upset if any of the others manage to get one of these toys she has claimed. prior to putting them in a backpack, she would pile them up and sit on them so that no one can touch them. She is not playing with them, she is actually playing with other toys, she just won't let anyone else play with them....now of course because she claims these toys everyday, the others want to play with them....its driving me crazy

  2. #2
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    I've had the same. I've always said no thanks these are everyone's toys and all our friends can play with them. I give her five mintues with the toys then say ok it's xxxx turn now and give the toys to the next child. She would cry but I'd distract her with something else and say u can't hog the toys they're everyone's toys. Everyone gets a turn. She eventually got it. I just had to keep taking them away when her turn was up. Lol kids hey?

  3. #3
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    I wouldn't allow this. After 5-10 mins of her "playing" with them, it would be someone else's turn if others were waiting for them. If she made a fuss about it, she would loose her turn or the toys would be put away until after nap or the next day.

    When I bring out or buy new toys, they get 5 or so minutes to play with it than it's their friends turn. By the time everyone has had a turn, they are starting to share it without my guidance.

  4. #4
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    My first step would be to remove the backpacks and other toy hoarding devices. Leaving the child to figure out how to carry them around using just her hands.

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  6. #5
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    Agree on removing the back packs and similar bags from the play area. I also made play stations and that has helped a lot in the sense that if you want to play with the dolls you have to stay in the doll area and if you want to play with the barn you stand at the table that has the barn and animals on it. That way you have to actually pick what you want to play with and are unable to hoard stuff from another area because you can't leave the playhouse or block corner with any items from there. Each place has some crossover items for imagination so what is in the space stays in the space. A lot easier for clean up too.

  7. #6
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    Another idea might be that when she is hoarding toys (sitting on them since you removed the backpacks) then bring out something new and exciting that you know she will like. Don't let her play with it though because "oh you are still playing with XX, once you put those toys away where they belong you can come share these with your friends. Making her miss out on other fun because she is opting to prevent certain toys from being used by others.

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  9. #7
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    Agree with everyone. After about 10 minutes it's time to share. Take toys from her and give to others. Also when I have "mine" kids I like to remind them that actually the toys are not their that they are mine and I am letting them use them. If the "mine" continues then they are taken away.

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    I generally take a different approach. I don't mind the hoarding with toddlers (depends how far into 3, the OP is) Since she is the first one there, she could feel that it's her space and the other kids are invading it. Is she possessive with other things as well? A chair, a spot on the couch for example? What I do with the under 4s is the toy they have belongs to them until they put it down. Adults don't share their things, so why do kids have too? I have found that the big issue with sharing is the belief that they won't get it back. I might try adding to Lee-Bee's suggestion. Take the backpack away until the others come. Give it to another child, and if and when they put it down, make a point of letting 3yo know it is available again.
    Last edited by kindertime; 03-11-2015 at 01:01 PM.

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  12. #9
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    I'm also of the belief that if a child wants to play with a certain toy, than it should be their turn with it until they put it down and are finished with it. I don't think it's fair for a child to have to share simply because someone else wants a turn, kids need to learn to wait their turn too.

    HOWEVER, what the OP is describing definitely is hoarding and over the top. She needs to learn to compromise a little. I would have a good chat with her first thing in the morning that she can put some toys in her backpack if she wants but that later you want to see her share some of them. Let her decide which ones she wants to share, if she doesn't want to share at all, than you take ALL the toys away as well as the backpack until she is ready to compromise.

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  14. #10
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    Yes, I agree that kids should be able to play until they are done with it USUALLY but what the OP is saying is different IMO.

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