Toy Hog

[mickyc]

I agree with fun care. I also don't make children share just because someone else wants it but in this case the child is hoarding toys which is totally different.

[Suzie_Homemaker]

She is not playing with them, she is actually playing with other toys, she just won't let anyone else play with them....now of course because she claims these toys everyday, the others want to play with them....its driving me crazy

I would tell her that toys not being used are available for other children. If she hogging one toy and others, try 15 min timer. After buzzer goes, some one else turn and she need to find different toy.

I have also said that it not your toy, all toys here are Suzie's toy so must be shared. If not shared, toy goes away and no one has it.

[flowerchild]

I don't force sharing so much as encourage turn taking. If someone wants a toy that someone else has, they can ask that person for it. That person in turn can either give it to them or if they aren't quite finished they can say that they'll give it to them when they are done.

What the OP is describing would not fly here though. If you aren't using a toy than anyone else can use it. I have one dck who started this a few weeks ago and I nipped that in the bud so quickly it wasn't funny.

[flowerchild]

I have also said that it not your toy, all toys here are Suzie's toy so must be shared. If not shared, toy goes away and no one has it.

I've said similar. I will also take the toy and ask them to let me know when they have come up with a plan to share it so I can give it back. They usually come after a few minutes with a plan which is usually "I'm going to play with it and then they're going to play with it and then I'm going to play with it, etc"

[33 Daiseys]

I have a two toy rule here. Meaning you only have two hands, how can you play with more then two toys at once.

[MsBell]

Thanks Ladies, I have been doing a lot of those ideas too, but this little one is very stubborn, and it seems a little unfair to the others that I keep taking the toys away. These toys are little, like some of the little people, and these little princess figurines I have. I think we are into our third week of this, and everyday its the same deal, she hoardes them, and as soon as another wants to touch them, thats when she freaks, because she's "playing with that". I also don't force the kids to share all the time, but this is weird, she is not playing with the toys, just either sitting on them, or stashing them in the backpack. I am thinking of putting them away for a good long time, next week when she comes, they are just gone? But then I second guessed myself, thinking perhaps I am the one with the issue? I have had kids not want to share toys they are playing with, but this is just a bit different, almost like she is instigating conflict in a rather passive way, perhaps this is a game to her? Having me play into it too, makes it exciting. I will say, here she is a good kid, listens to direction,stays with the group etc, but at pick up and drop off with mom, major nightmare attitude.

[Suzie_Homemaker]

There was little boy here many year ago who would put dinkies under his leg so other child cannot play with them. For him, I had to do two toys rule. One per hand. Anything under his legs was fair game. Used to get him to pick two and then the rest were available.

[kindertime]

Have you tried encouraging her to play with these toys? Like getting her to make a special bed or house for them? Could she decorate a shoe box or Kleenex box. All the kids could have a special box for a few special toys. If you wanted to limit the time, making it "before snack" is the time for special toys, or something. After that, everything is community property again.

Maybe she could "name" the little people. Here, all of ours have names. Is there a separate corner where she could take them to play with them where she could be "protected" from others taking them? I really do think there is at least some element of her having a need for control. I also agree with what fun&care said, when you need her to share, allow her to decide which one or ones to give away. Maybe put a time limit on that to. "You can share for 5 minutes, then you can have it back."

[flowerchild]

Thanks Ladies, I have been doing a lot of those ideas too, but this little one is very stubborn, and it seems a little unfair to the others that I keep taking the toys away. These toys are little, like some of the little people, and these little princess figurines I have. I think we are into our third week of this, and everyday its the same deal, she hoardes them, and as soon as another wants to touch them, thats when she freaks, because she's "playing with that". I also don't force the kids to share all the time, but this is weird, she is not playing with the toys, just either sitting on them, or stashing them in the backpack. I am thinking of putting them away for a good long time, next week when she comes, they are just gone? But then I second guessed myself, thinking perhaps I am the one with the issue? I have had kids not want to share toys they are playing with, but this is just a bit different, almost like she is instigating conflict in a rather passive way, perhaps this is a game to her? Having me play into it too, makes it exciting. I will say, here she is a good kid, listens to direction,stays with the group etc, but at pick up and drop off with mom, major nightmare attitude.

What if you put the backpacks/bags away and see what she does then?

I don't think you are the one with the issue. None of us are witnessing it or know this little girl....but when I read that last part about nightmare attitude with mom for some reason it made me think it was some type of game playing/behavioural thing.

The suggestion about encouraging her to play with them is good. If she's not playing with them, they can go back on the shelf or bin. People are allowed to have favourite toys, but that doesn't make them off limits to everyone else. Toys at daycare are for sharing.

At this point, I'd either hide the backpacks or the toys for a bit and go from there. Or maybe put away some of the hoarded toys. So, leave the princesses, but put away the little people. Maybe she has so many favourites that she can't choose which to play with? It would also be a good way to see if it's toy-specific behaviour or just about controlling the toys in general.