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Thread: I am so done!

  1. #1
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    I am so done!

    So I posted in another thread that I've decided to give notice to my daycare families May 1st that I will be closing permanently at the end of June. So they get about a two month notice period which I think is more than fair. And I get the summer off which I am SUPER excited for! Money will be tight but I may not get this opportunity to have the summer off with my kids for a long while. I'll be looking for employment aiming for August/September start.

    Problem is I don't even know if I can make it til then! One of the (many) reasons I am closing is due to my daughter being fed up with daycare. I had a four day weekend and it was bliss. She is a really sweet kid and behaves really well...until the daycare kids return. The last two days have been horrible. She throws fits for no reason, is sometimes rough with the others and generally is not a happy camper. I think she is just so over the whole daycare thing. She turned 4 in feb and is sooooo ready for school. The daycare environment is not challenging enough for her but it is also frustrating to her to always have to share her home, her mother and her things with these kids for 50 hours per week. She does have her room with her own toys she can retreat to when she wants too, and she does so often but still....

    I myself am really not into it anymore so it's hard. Every day I am counting down. Its tough because I still have to put on a smile and give these kids the care they deserve of course. But it's hard when you're not in the mood!

    Thanks for letting me vent!!!

  2. #2
    Euphoric ! bright sparks's Avatar
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    I hear you!

    Your daughter like you say is probably more than ready for kindergarten and I am assuming from what you say that this is the brunt of the cause for her acting out. That being said, life sometimes sucks and we have to learn to deal with it, even when we are 4. Even though you are closing, she will take important lessons from the time you have been running a daycare which will no doubt serve her well when she has to spend 5 days a week with a large group where she won't get the close attention she once got at home with you and a smaller group. It will hopefully make her have a greater tolerance as she grows up due to having to share you and her home. It may suck now, but I think these are difficult but extremely valuable lessons our children have to learn. When you are done, you are done though. I totally get it. I have 18 weeks left and wish I could close earlier but I won't be getting another job, I'll be a full time student for 6 years so I need to make every penny until closing day count.

    My group of kids are great, it's more the parents that are driving me a little batty now who I have to bite my tongue with. My tolerance for the BS is rapidly reducing so I have to try not to react to it as its not worth it at this point. I'd recommend making the most of things while you are at home with your daughter as like you said, you'll never get that time again. Make a bucket list with your daughter of special activities you want to do before closing. Have her be involved in planning and executing them to hopefully positively engage her in your daycare for the last 3 months till closing day.

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  4. #3
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    Do you think she might respond well to some sort of count down till the daycare closes. Maybe phrase it differently...count down until a "Mommy and Me summer" Something fun like a big jar of jelly beans...she gets to eat one every night and can watch how the jar empties until the last day of daycare.

    Not sure if it would help any...but could be fun and you can try to spin it so she realizes she only has a little time left for daycare so try to make the most of it.

    Also maybe have her spends some of her daycare time planning the summer. Make lists of what she would like to do, places to go, games to play, crafts to do etc. Get her mind off how she isn't enjoying the daycare and thinking ahead to what she will enjoy.

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  6. #4
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    I am in the same and the exact opposite position that you are in!! LOL...My count down has already begun at home with my boys!! I'll be quitting my job, after 3 years, to get BACK into daycare (which I did for 6 years before going back to work) We all have missed it terribly!! I love the Jelly bean in a jar idea and Im am going to definitely do that, except replace the jelly beans with chocolate!!

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  8. #5
    Euphoric !
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    This is why I have my daycare separate from my living space. My daughter has the option of going upstairs to play or watch tv if she needs to get away. It's not her choice I did daycare. She never ever has to share her toys.

    Good luck over the next few months. It's hard to keep your head in the game when you know you are done.

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  10. #6
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    I agree that my kids will have learned valuable lessons from doing daycare. Daycare has been great in a lot of ways. For one my kids are great with little ones...they've watched their mom take care of others for years so it only makes sense! Plus I am grateful that I got to be there with them in their early years and I wouldn't trade that for anything.

    Oddly enough though, I also have less tolerance for parent BS, BUT I'm finding that I'm just letting things slide because I know it's almost over anyways and there isn't much of a point. For one, one of my dc families has been paying late consistently because of sick days taken by me or them on payday. This same family brought their daughter to daycare after saying she had thrown up the night before ( despite my 24 hour policy!!!!!)....they have been with me the longest and it's frustrating that they feel maybe I am "cool" with these things because we have a good rapport. It's disrespectful but I just don't feel like dealing with it. I know I should but....meh.

    I love the idea of counting down with a jar of jelly beans! I will have to start that later on though since we haven't told the kids yet. I know for a fact they would just blurt it out to the daycare kids or parents if they knew!

    Just to clarify mickyc that I did mention she is free to play in her room which has LOTS of her own toys that belong to her and only her although she sometimes chooses to bring some down and share them with her friends.

    I think it will do her some good to have the summer off just as much as it will do me some good. I think having a break from being with other kids will be good for her and when she starts school she can start fresh.

  11. #7
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    I had this same problem with my daughter who is now in JK. I sometimes see this happening with my now 3 yo as well. What has helped me was letting her have more freedom to play in her room, watch TV as was suggested. I asked my in laws for help to take her to a gymnastic program or something one day a week out of the house but that never happened. I think it would have been good for her though. I tried spending more time with her (I know this is hard because you are exhausted) we would read a story together at nap time and snuggle. I involved her in planning what we would do. We did a lot more park outings because I knew she loved them although I dreaded them because it is so much work! When I am feeling uninspired in general with daycare I spend some time over the weekend coming up with an awesome "rec schedule." I found I was more likely to do things if they were written down but I didn't stress if they didn't happen either. I would let her do somethings that the others couldn't do e.g. my 3 y o daughter now gets to "wash dishes" where she basically plays in the soapy water in the kitchen sink which is normally off limits to the kids unless I am in there (it's gated).

    I was also very firm with her. I found that because I felt guilty that she wasn't happy I started to let things slide with her behaviour. I ran a tighter ship and she settled more too.

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  13. #8
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    My daughter was so done with being around the daycare kids by the time it got to the spring before kindergarten started. Even though her bedroom was off limits to the daycare kids, it wasn't enough. She is so much happier being at school every day with kids her own age or older. Last summer I ended up finding some summer day camps and sending her to spend time with her grandparents because it was stressful for me to deal with her being so unhappy almost every day.

    I don't know how this summer is going to go, but I have also decided that I will be closing my daycare sometime around August or September. My body just can't handle the demands of taking care of all these little kids, my hands are not getting better. I need to have atleast 4 or 5 full time daycare kids and I physically can't do it. The idea of going through another long winter with all the snow suits just makes my hands ache. :-(

    So we are arranging daycare for my own girls for the fall and trying to getting everything sorted out. I don't know what I will do for work yet, but if anything I will substitute teach.

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  15. #9
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    I would also suggest you send her to a community centre daycare for a week or 2 over the summer. I know you want to spend the time with her but this will help her develop more skills to prep her for kindergarten, including listening to other authority figures, and also may help mix up your summer and she will have fun!

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  17. #10
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    I think she is going to LOVE school. She loves other kids in general and wherever we go, she always wants to make friends. Which is a huge contrast from my older son who was super shy and introverted. He had a hard time with school but I am positive she won't.

    Sorry to hear your hands aren't improving Amanda. I can't imagine how you get through the day while managing physical pain. Snowsuits are the worst even without pain!

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