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  1. #1
    Shy
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    Shocked-Social Services

    I have been following Tammy Larabie's story and I am in complete shock. I have been running a home daycare or many years and as I mom with two children I can't believe this.

    I have an issue I am dealing with currently with a family. This issue with a combination of Tammys story made me realize that daycare is too much of a liability.

    I had a family who thought their 12 month old child got beat up by a toddler on his first day of her starting daycare. DCM thought this happened while I quickly went to the washroom. Her demands were insane but at the time I needed to fill the spot quick and being a single mom I didn't have any additional income.
    She demanded that I rock the child to sleep and let him sleep in my bed, feed him pureed foods (no solids) every 1.5 hours and give him formula bottles every 3 hours (special timing). In addition, he could only be changed on my carpet not on changing mat or changing table in my washroom.

    Needless to say this child had a horrible time adjusting and his first day he threw him self all over the floor and playpen when I would try to get him to sleep. I told mom she had to pick up because the child was almost to the point of puking from crying. DCM didn't like this very much.

    DCB had a very red marks ( looked more like a rash). DCM didn't like that I wasn't able to accommodate all her wants as I had their children to look after not just her and that I called her to pick up because DCB was crying uncontrollably.

    She wanted to term right away no notice what so ever. I ask for a three weeks deposit and in my contract it stats that if the contract is broken and I don't get a three weeks notice the deposit will not be refunded.

    DCM showed up to my house the next day demand money (walking right into my house) I said I don't refund money if I am not given notice as it was stated in the contract BUT I will see what I could do. I felt bad for her since she was a single mom herself.

    I don't know about the rest of you ladies but daycare has been VERY slow. I told DCM that since I still haven't been able to fill her spot there was no way I could afford to refund her. She told me she is going to take me to court and today I ironically received a phone call from child and social services. They will be coming to the daycare this evening because someone called in and complained about my daycare.

    I have no idea what to expect or what to say. I am so upset I got all parents to pick kids up early due stress. I don't want to keep the children in a stressful environment. I have never ever had an issue with this so I am scared/not scared/sad/mad just a mix of emotions. Does anyone know what will happen when they come?

    Any advice/support would be nice

  2. #2
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    If u have nothing to hide then don't worry. Obviously that mom called and is just taking revenge on u because you couldn't "nanny" her son. Go around ur home now and tidy it up make sure safe things are in place, plug covers, wires up etc. have your contracts ready they will want to see how many kids are enrolled. Just answer all their questions honestly and show them ur daycare space. Don't worry .....again if u don't have Anything to hide don't worry . On another note, it really reks me when a mom insists we do all these demands with their child. Don't they realize we have or could have four other kids in our care to tend to? I'm sure they wouldn't like it if their child was playing on their own while we rocked another one to sleep urgh!!! Lol. Good luck tonight. No worries

  3. #3
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    First off relax! Despite what some people think about the CAS, they are not out to get anyone. The people that are really anti CAS are usually people who have a reason to be. If you have nothing to hide then I would try not to stress out (easier said then done!) They are just going to follow through with their obligation to ensure that there isn't anything shady going on.

    As for the mom- Document, document, document! Any future conversations you have with this mom needs to be through email, text or written letter. Keep every conversation you have. Start a file with any and all communication, the contract etc.

    What does your contract say regarding her deposit? Are you in the right to keep it as you aren't providing care but asked her to pick her child up? She may be entitled to have it back if you aren't honoring the termination period agreement.

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  5. #4
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    I agree with both ladies. I am sure you will be fine so try to relax. Take some time and get the daycare "show ready" and have your contracts laid out so they can read them. If you have any letters of references from past clients or cards with notes in them, I'd have those handy too just in case. It shows that past clients were happy with your services.

    I would be nervous too but not because I have anything to hide...it's just natural to be on the defense when someone makes a false claim against you I think. Have a bottle of wine chilling in the fridge and ask a friend to come over when the visit is done. I would want to have a drink and vent to a friend or my husband when it's all over lol

    Good luck!!

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  7. #5
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    Calm down. It will be fine. If you got nothing to hide, nothing to worry about.

    I hope some of your issue with this parent documented. Not all verbal. It important when client being tricky to stop the conversations and use text or e-mail. This is hard evidence if needed. Conversation is hearsay. Always good idea to switch to e-mail or text for tricky customers.

    One step at a time...

    First social services. They will come in. They will look around. If you are registered, speak to your agency and get some advice. If you not registered, no big deal.

    Do you know your regs and obligations and work inside them?

    When SS come, they will look at your set up briefly. Unregistered not take long as fewer regs. They will check you aren't over number, they will check kids properly cared for. It might be good idea to have contracts copied for all babies and parent contact details. These client can back up your care and confirm to SS which children are in your care. Parent not stupid. They know how many kids you care for even if they not know the limits. This good for SS to be able to confirm. Transparency good.

    If your regs for unregistered is just numbers, that's all they can check on except for obvious abuse/neglect/poor standards of care. They can't make you have covered sockets, stair gates or anything else that not in your provincial regs. If your regs are numbers and something else, then that's all they can check on. They can't make up requirements which not part of your regs.

    Tell them straight that you believe this complaint from unrealistic client who you refused to return deposit to because she not give notice. Have copy of her contract there too.

    Would be good if there is an e-mail exchange of her demands and then her leaving and wanting deposit returned. Is any of it in writing?

    Understand they must come in if there is a complaint. They get malicious complaints at times. They not stupid. They not interested in making life hard for good carers. They just have to follow up.

    Next, this client - Don't let intimidate you. She not give proper notice, so she not get money. Ignore her calls, you need everything in writing. If she text or message demanding refund, be professional and polite. Everything you say might end up in front of Small Claim Judge so good incentive to mind your words. Just reply that the contact explain that notice required or deposit forfeited and say you are not refunding because no notice. If you can, attach copy of her contract so she can see - but also so Judge can see that you made sure she had paperwork to check.

    And sit back - she most likely bluffing about court. She is in wrong, not you. So, what she going to take you to court for? She will have to pay to file case and then if she lose, she have to pay costs too. She has no grounds to sue.

    You not obligated to answer all her message. Next demand, just answer one time, with copy of contract and decline refund. Then stop talking. No need to repeat. No need explain. She can read contract. If she got problem still, let her file in court.

    STOP BEING NICE - every time you agree to let her off the terms of the contract, you are changing it. If you have clear papers saying non-refundable and then you agree to give her refund being nice, you have just agreed to change terms and you lose all your rights. What is point of having contract and then letting client rip off anyway?

    You told her you could not refund now STOP TALKING to her, STOP renegotiating. Only written replies, keep everything, and stick to your contact or you will talk yourself into a hole.

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  9. #6
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    Thank you so much
    I feel better already. I was dreading doing the dishes today but in the end I don't think I've ever finished so fast! I went over everything, it's all clean and tidy. I have all conversations saved Should I mention to the social worker how last night I told DCM I could not refund her and she said she would take me to court and then the next day? When I asked who made the report she said she could not say as they wanted to remain anonymous so is it worth it to mention this parent and show my communication with this paren t to the worker? the dcm left me 2 weeks ago and in this 2 weeks I was trying to refund her money because I felt bad about the situation and I honestly didn't want to be bothered by her as she is very demanding because I have my own kids to wrry about but I cant afford it I barely have any kids here last night I told the mom I just cant afford to give her her money back and she told me she will go to court and then this call today
    Last edited by Hape*; 03-30-2015 at 02:21 PM.

  10. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hape* View Post
    Should I mention to the social worker how last night I told DCM I could not refund her and she said she would take me to court and then the next day? When I asked who made the report she said she could not say as they wanted to remain anonymous so is it worth it to mention this parent and show my communication with this parent to the worker?
    I not think they too worried about details of your contract. That not their job. They understand disputes happen.

    I think I would say that I am sure who is behind complaint, that they been tricky client and demanding refund not entitled to have. Leave it like that. If it not come up, don't worry.

  11. #8
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    Main thing is be honest when they ask you a question and look them in the eye - they just need to do their job and follow up on the complaint by a visit to your daycare - it is just part of their job , they see both sides and need to tell the parent they checked up on you and everything is in order
    Good Luck and keep us informed

  12. #9
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    I just finished my meeting with the worker and I wantd to update ever body , the meeting was so good she was nice and said couple times that mostly these calls are out of spite only about 10% that they receive are truly real complaint. I told her about my conversation last night with parent and she little bit hint to me that she was the culprit although the she could not say she told me as her job require her to not say who report. Now she said part of the policy is to call 3 current parent to ask about me I am worried these other parents will wonder what happened and may leave now as a report is never good no matter what the intent is behind it. She told me she will put a good word while she question the other 3 parents but I still worry I will now lose the only client I had.

  13. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hape* View Post
    I just finished my meeting with the worker and I wantd to update ever body , the meeting was so good she was nice and said couple times that mostly these calls are out of spite only about 10% that they receive are truly real complaint. I told her about my conversation last night with parent and she little bit hint to me that she was the culprit although the she could not say she told me as her job require her to not say who report. Now she said part of the policy is to call 3 current parent to ask about me I am worried these other parents will wonder what happened and may leave now as a report is never good no matter what the intent is behind it. She told me she will put a good word while she question the other 3 parents but I still worry I will now lose the only client I had.
    No. Just be honest. Tell client basics of what happened. Explain that SS have been out and are satisfied but this is a requirement. Tell them that you have nothing to hide, they are welcome to confirm that for themselves when speaking to SS. As long as you transparent, client's are understanding.

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