How do I discipline this child?

[5 Little Monkeys]

Discoveries has some great advice and tips. I also agree with lee bee that you need to find what he values and use that. For one of my past handful's, it was a pink chair. She was only allowed to sit on it for afternoon snack if she had a good day. It worked like a charm!! I would advise NOT to use food though. We don't have cake (that often) and never candy so I wouldn't start that and my kids like rice cakes and I don't like the idea of using healthy food as punishment. It only teaches them that healthy food is related to punishment and that shouldn't be the case! IMO.

Decide on a game plan, how long you're willing to give it a go and talk to the parents. Give them a hard date and let them know that if you don't see improvement by xxx date, they will have to be terminated in order for you to keep your groups best interest in mind. Let them know what your plan is and hopefully they will try the same or similar at home.

At 4 years old, this behaviour could be from a few things....lack of parental discipline, could just be his personality and/or the inconsistenticy from multiple dc's and likely a mat leave with mom? This boy sounds like he needs a constant firm provider in his life....if you're up for it, this might be you!! Good luck!!! Some trying days are sure to be in your future!