I take deposit - I would love to go on people's word but sadly, not all people are trustworthy so it doesn't really work unless people have same standards as me. This is why we need deposit and contract.
I agree that you only asked to be kept updated and you offered to hold place. You did not expect any commitment in return and so you got no commitment in return.
Yes might be tempting to answer her ad and tell her you are holding a place but you didn't actually ask for a firm decision from her. I agree she is likely trying to keep options open and you are plan B but you permitted that.

































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