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Mat leave goodbyes
I have a little one leaving this week to go off on mat leave with his mom who just gave birth.
The parents seem to be building up the departure and I am sad about it too but I am not sure to what level I should go and say good bye.
I'm wondering what others have done in the past when a DCK goes off because mom had a baby. Do you throw a party? Do you give a gift?
I give a memory book to children who leave daycare after 3 years to start JK but not too sure what to do this time when it's only been 15 months.
Suggestions? Thoughts? Experiences?
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Expansive...
I do a big brother or sister shirt with them with their handprints. And get them a little gift and a gift for new baby. I don't throw a party but will have a treat like cupcakes for afternoon snack. It's sad to see them go, no matter how long they've been with us
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Special lunch of his fave foods. Ask mom if she wants to bring desert.
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I actually talk about when a child is leaving to all of them for about 2 weeks prior. It's a big change for everyone...me, the parents, the child leaving and the others who are loosing a friend. We talk about why the child is leaving and how we will miss them etc.
Their last day here, we have a fun lunch and treat and we give a goodbye gift and hugs at pick up time.
I've only had one leave on mat leave and I knew she would bring them back for a play date once baby was born so I gave baby a gift then. If I didn't think I'd see them soon or even again, than I'd give a gift on their last day for the baby. Usually, if I know they aren't coming back, I give a family gift though.
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I always give a gift when a child leaves. I usually spend less than $20. I write a nice card to the parents, get their final receipt done and include it in envelope. If there is a new baby I always give a baby gift.
We also talk about the child leaving at daycare. It's hard on everyone to have a child leave. I have had a few sudden departures and it was very hard on everyone.
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A card crafted from the other kids is nice and if u have any photos of the child over the course of time they were with u, put in a little photo album. Fifteen months still a fair amount of time in your care. For baby I usually give a children's book the siblings can enjoy too.
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Euphoric !
This has me umming and ahhing to be honest. I always buy a new baby gift that's for sure. But the child leaving...well I'm not sure why I would buy that child a gift?? I always buy a gift for a child moving up into kindergarten, but it is kindergarten related. A Kindergarten themed story book, or a lunch bag/box or pencil and pad or something similar. That is a milestone worth celebrating, but leaving because of maternity leave, shouldn't I be the one receiving a gift as way of a thank you for everything?? lol Why does the kid get a gift? Can anyone tell me? I give gifts as a gesture of thanks or in celebration, but I see none of these reasons for a child leaving due to the parents circumstances. I'm not trying to be an ass, but there is a certain amount of entitlement that kids have growing up and I think it's the adults in their lives, me included, who are responsible for this. It is learnt behaviour. Then they grow up expecting gifts, which I think is a disservice. It's like when your child has a birthday and the sibling gets a gift too...that is not okay in my mind. There is a lesson to be learned in not being the centre of attention on your brother or sisters birthday, and by being pacified with a gift for fear of them acting out, is not a good thing. I see this as similar.
I would write a nice card of thanks, if applicable, for being such a great family to deal with and for the opportunity to be part of their child's life and upbringing. But I wouldn't buy this kid a gift. I think it's totally unnecessairy. A party for the kids with party games and something fun that is saved for special occasions is more than enough. And the kid won't care about not getting a gift.
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Originally Posted by bright sparks
This has me umming and ahhing to be honest. I always buy a new baby gift that's for sure. But the child leaving...well I'm not sure why I would buy that child a gift?? I always buy a gift for a child moving up into kindergarten, but it is kindergarten related. A Kindergarten themed story book, or a lunch bag/box or pencil and pad or something similar. That is a milestone worth celebrating, but leaving because of maternity leave, shouldn't I be the one receiving a gift as way of a thank you for everything?? lol Why does the kid get a gift? Can anyone tell me? I give gifts as a gesture of thanks or in celebration, but I see none of these reasons for a child leaving due to the parents circumstances. I'm not trying to be an ass, but there is a certain amount of entitlement that kids have growing up and I think it's the adults in their lives, me included, who are responsible for this. It is learnt behaviour. Then they grow up expecting gifts, which I think is a disservice. It's like when your child has a birthday and the sibling gets a gift too...that is not okay in my mind. There is a lesson to be learned in not being the centre of attention on your brother or sisters birthday, and by being pacified with a gift for fear of them acting out, is not a good thing. I see this as similar.
I would write a nice card of thanks, if applicable, for being such a great family to deal with and for the opportunity to be part of their child's life and upbringing. But I wouldn't buy this kid a gift. I think it's totally unnecessairy. A party for the kids with party games and something fun that is saved for special occasions is more than enough. And the kid won't care about not getting a gift.
Exactly ! I agree.
I already gave the family the baby present when the baby was born but the DCK stayed a couple of weeks longer while mom recovered. Getting the DCK a gift just seems strange to me. IT doesn't sit right.
I give the memory book for kids who are here from 1 - 4 years old but I don't think I should have to go to that much effort for 15 months. I give birthday and Christmas gifts but this is not seeming like a 'gift' occasion to me and they are not leaving because of school or moving - it's to go on mat leave. Sigh.
I think a card with some nice words is a good idea and then a homemade tee with it celebrating the older sibling.
I've been talking to the daycare kids about the change over for weeks but quite frankly they are kind of excited because the know the DCK who is taking the spot and are looking forward to the change.
Now I feel under pressure like I will have to summon tears on Friday and I am very rare to cry about daycare transitions.
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One of my dc girls has her last day here on Thursday due to her mother's mat leave. She's been here for 4 years. I make a photo album for most of the children that leave daycare, unless it happens too fast. She's bound to miss her friends and this is a good way to have nice memories of the time she spent with her friends. We'll also be having pizza and cake for lunch.
I'm giving mom a present for the new baby. I think it's also a nice gesture to buy the new child a present. A birth is a milestone and this family has been a part of my daycare for a significant amount of time.
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Originally Posted by Spixie33
Now I feel under pressure like I will have to summon tears on Friday and I am very rare to cry about daycare transitions.
This is a much better situation than having a parent - just never come back - with no opportunity to say goodbye when you have been so close to the child. That is worse. Believe me.
You don't have to fake tears, but be genuine. The dcm might be making a big deal at daycare because it is a big deal for her. Honestly, I don't know of any parents around here that take the older kid out of daycare for a mat leave. Maybe it happens...
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