20 Month Old Still On Purees & Barely Self Feeding Spoon

[playfelt]

I would be setting a guideline of expectation that by 24 months child should have advanced to the level you would normally expect of an 18-20 month old which allows for his prematurity. That said it means no bottles at daycare and use of a sippy cup, feeding self finger foods and attempting to use a spoon or at least know what it is for even if they can't actually get food to the mouth etc. Sounds to me like mom got caught up in the prematurity and forgot the part about them catching up over time and that the goal was the same as for any child and to gradually push them to the next developmental level.

As to the puree that comes I use infant cereal to thicken it to a pudding consistency so easier for me to feed or child to feed themselves - ie neither one of us slops it everywhere. Also as of a certain date child should be eating the daycare menu so that you are no longer having to specially prepare his foods.

[Lee-Bee]

If he was around 2months preemie there is a good chance he had feeding issues in those early days and the mom definitely may still be fixated on that. Just happy he eats so not wanting to rock the boat by moving to the next step. Completely understandable...BUT she does need some help to move past that so the child can get caught up.

My daughter was 5weeks premature, luckily she had no feeding issues, from what I remember it is until about age 2 that they are referred to by their gestational age (if otherwise healthy). So, while some leeway can be given the child definitely should be further along or at least have home encouraging him to be further along than strained purees.

Maybe when approaching mom do it gently noting how far the boy has come from being X weeks early etc...so she can see you understand where they came from and she feels you are acknowledging that the child is "special" in that he started off at a different level than his peers. Perhaps this will help mom be a bit more open and accepting of your nudging them along!