Vent: Clothing

[Lou]

Yeah...I think I'm with Mom on this one. Kids get scrapes, no biggie. I get where you're coming from, but I think I would have just made the suggestion of wearing pants to protect her knees, then the Mom could take it or leave it. It's not like it's a ridiculous situation where it's snowing out and she's wearing sandals or something neglectful like that. She's definitely entitled to dress her child in shorts in warm weather- I'm not sure I would receive that well either.

[Suzie_Homemaker]

I think you over-stepped the boundaries.

Kids get scraped knees, so what? And single parent or not, a small child needs new clothes every season because of their growing and it's expensive. I can totally understand her upset having invested in summer clothes to now being stressed about providing alternatives. Winter pants that she's wearing now will not be appropriate weight for summer.

[torontokids]

I think Amanda just did what a lot of us do, myself included (I loath flip flops!). The same way you request splash pants etc she just mentioned "can you please continue to send DCG in pants?" I know there are other providers that say "no overalls" or "no dresses." I think once mom said she had already bought her clothes then that is when you say "OK, no biggie" and deal with it or keep some of her other pants available and on hand. Who knows, the kid may start being more careful when walking once they fall a couple of times. I have some uneven concrete on my backyard patio. The first few times a kid is playing back there they fall for sure then they learn to be more careful.

[5 Little Monkeys]

I ask for weather appropriate clothing. I have to admit, scraped knees wouldn't even cross my mind as I do allow shorts in the summer. Each child has a drawer of spare clothing here and I would have put pants on her and sent her home like that and told her she needs to send replacement pants for the drawer. MB weather is not shorts only in the summer so guaranteed mom has some pants she could send as back up if needed.

[AmandaKDT]

I think you over-stepped the boundaries.

Kids get scraped knees, so what? And single parent or not, a small child needs new clothes every season because of their growing and it's expensive. I can totally understand her upset having invested in summer clothes to now being stressed about providing alternatives. Winter pants that she's wearing now will not be appropriate weight for summer.

I absolutely don't think I over stepped my boundries. The pants she has been wearing all winter have been light weight stretchy pants since I have been potty training her. She has tonnes of them and I wasn't asking the mom to buy anything at all. I wasn't meaning that she should wear sweatpants in the middle of an August heat wave!

And I think that if I can prevent scraped knees by just asking this little girl to continue wearing pants while she is gets her footing in her first year really doing any active outdoor play then I am not doing anything wrong. My group is all over 2 years old and when we go out they all walk, I rarely use a stroller. So the chances of tripping on a sidewalk are quite high. It is no different than asking for waterproof winter mitts to prevent frozen fingers or a summer hat to prevent sun burn.

I actually really dislike little kids wearing shorts at daycare and I really dislike having to deal with a little child screaming and crying because they have a bloody gravel filled scape that could have been prevented. My day is busy enough, I try to be as proactive as possible.

I tell the parents what type of clothes to send every season, right down to the type of foot wear. Do you not do this?

[AmandaKDT]

Lou - It was intended to be a really casual conversation, I just wanted to mention that I would prefer to continue with the pants to try to prevent scraped knees if possible and then it turned into a big thing. I really wasn't expecting mom to get all upset and blow it up into something it wasn't.

But the mom never responded to the email that I sent her and acted like nothing had happened when she picked her child up yesterday. So I guess she realized it was no big deal? I don't know. I am not going to bring it up again.

[Lee-Bee]

I don't it is unreasonable to have a parent adjust their ways in order for you to maintain care of a group of 5 young children. Skinned knees at home is one thing but skinned knees with 5 kids running around means you have to direct attention to the skinned knees and not the group. If you can easily prevent the skinned knees then it is reasonable to do so. It's not like it is extremely hot, you are transitioning into a new season...kids going from padded snowpants straight to shorts will inevitably skin their knees. That layer of pants helps wonders until the kids learn their footing and figure out how to manage bare pavement.

Obviously if they truly don't have any pants (even some that fit but are small) then their child would have to have skinned knees. Perhaps the mom would see your point when the child is bloody at pick up each day. But it is such a simple request for the mom to accommodate.

Hopefully you just caught her at a bad moment and she comes around.

[mickyc]

For myself I offer suggestions of what I would like. I send it my monthly newsletter. Maybe mom felt singled out because you talked to her directly? I personally don't see the issue with pants vs shorts. Those thin pants aren't going to do much good either if they fall and will just be in the way if a scrape happens IMO. I likely wouldn't have been happy with your request either.

I just sent out my newsletter. It says all kids are required to bring hats daily, that I prefer the kind that covers their ears and even better if it ties under their chin. I also mentioned no flip flops allowed, sandals need to be Velcro, to make sure they check their box to switch out weather appropriate clothing that stays here. Also I ask that a sweater gets left here. I have a boy already with a ball cap. I don't like it as I have to worry about his ears getting sunburnt but whatever. It is what it is.

[Suzie_Homemaker]

I absolutely don't think I over stepped my boundries. The pants she has been wearing all winter have been light weight stretchy pants since I have been potty training her. She has tonnes of them and I wasn't asking the mom to buy anything at all. I wasn't meaning that she should wear sweatpants in the middle of an August heat wave!

And I think that if I can prevent scraped knees by just asking this little girl to continue wearing pants while she is gets her footing in her first year really doing any active outdoor play then I am not doing anything wrong. My group is all over 2 years old and when we go out they all walk, I rarely use a stroller. So the chances of tripping on a sidewalk are quite high. It is no different than asking for waterproof winter mitts to prevent frozen fingers or a summer hat to prevent sun burn.

I actually really dislike little kids wearing shorts at daycare and I really dislike having to deal with a little child screaming and crying because they have a bloody gravel filled scape that could have been prevented. My day is busy enough, I try to be as proactive as possible.

I tell the parents what type of clothes to send every season, right down to the type of foot wear. Do you not do this?

That is fine. You posted in public forum for views. I gave mine. I really not care if you agree with mine or not. This isn't a dispute. This isn't an argument where there is a "winner". You asked for views, you have mine. Take it on board or ignore it but this back and forth about whether or not you agree with me is irrelevant unless you were asking for people to just confirm your view.

No, I do not go down to details. I feel an adult who was old enough to have sex, and to have a child, is the parent and if they make poor choices it not my place to micro manage.

I tell parent that we go outside all seasons. That they need weather appropriate clothing for the season because if they come in flip flop in December feet will be cold and wet.

[Lou]

So, then I think the matter was handled in a great way. You expressed your suggestion and instead of getting upset with you in person in front of the kids, she let it stew for a bit, couldn't let it drop and instead expressed her feelings via email where she could get her point across, and then she dropped it and moved on. No grudges, no awkwardness just moving on.