Issues with neighbourhood kids

[flowerchild]

I feel for you! I would think you need to be firm, really firm. Have them play inside, not outside (easier to direct). If they break a rule (that you have clearly laid out) then firmly, clearly and explicitly tell them it is time for them to go home, they can come play another day when they are ready to listen and behave. Every time they come, kick them out when they don't follow your rules.

I agree with this, except for the inside the house part. No way would they be coming inside my house. They need to earn that privilege and it doesn't sound like that will happen anytime soon.

If you are already having them inside your house, then I think you need to be incredibly firm and incredibly consistent with follow through. ie. "Please don't jump on my couches." Child jumps on couches. "OK, time to go home." Child complains. "I'm sorry, but since you cannot follow my rules, you cannot be in my house. You may try again next time. Goodbye" Same with when outside.

If their mom wasn't going to address her child's behaviour until four or five different people corroborated the story, I wouldn't plan on any support from her. Especially since her first response was "well, what did your kid do to her?"