Letting a child go..

[fivelittleones]

I had the same experience...it's a commitment on your end. It can be very frustrating and time consuming. It's tough love unfortunately. By catering to his needs every few minutes and going in the room when he cries at nap, it will make it worse and yes- its true, he's training you and most likely he has his parents fully trained as well :/ I would decide if you are willing to commit to this child and if you decide to, you need to be very consistent. Never go in the room when your trying to train him to self sooth, unless you think he's hurt. I think the video monitor is a great idea. Also, I would put him in a different room or on another level in your house. He will come around it just takes time. If you let him go, it will not solve your problem....you could get another child the same and have to go through it again. I decided to commit to mine who had the same issue, it took almost 8 weeks. Ultimately I thought it was good for him to have someone to teach him to be independent and self sooth. Keep the communication to a limit while he's transitioning (if you decide to commit to him) If not, than yes, I would give the parents daily reports so they won't be shocked if you have to let him go. Try not to dote on him. He will learn when you come to daycare, this is the way it is. When he's at home, that's their business and their problem. I know it's hard, but stick to your guns! You'll get through it

[Lee-Bee]

I do not agree with leaving an infant to cry it out BUT this is a 1 yr old and he is not your child. He should have been taught the skills needed to sleep on his own before he started group care. Now he needs to learn the hard way. Do NOT go in every 5min. all you are doing is teaching him to cry longer to see how fast you come.

It sucks, for you and the child but you need to just place him in a safe place and leave...until nap time is over. Video monitors are incredibly helpful for this!

It will take a long time, have him nap as far from the other children as you can.

Children like this will fight as long as they can before they accept their new nap reality. I had one child sit for the full nap period, every day for 9 weeks refusing to sleep. She would nod off, fall over and shake her self awake and sit back up...waiting. Luckily she was silent...just down right refusing to nap on her own in a crib (rocked for naps at home...like held for the whole nap). After 9 weeks she started sleeping 2-3hour naps and became my best sleeper! She just fought as long as she could but eventually came to the realization she had to sleep.

The screamers are much harder...but it is the same battle. Them trying to win the situation by getting you to come back. They need to learn, quickly that nap time is time to nap. By going in every 5minutes you are keeping them awake.

It is so sad for these children but it really was up to the parents to ensure they prepared the child for group care, and that means having them know how to sleep, on their own, and going down awake not rocked.

Hang in there!