Furious at this parent!!

[bright sparks]

So yesterday "that" kid picked a hole in the top of my daughters mattress right through to the stuffing. He sleeps either on top of her bed or my bed with a blanket. He obviously woke up early and was messing. He stripped her bed completely removing all of her sheets. He picked a hole about the size of a golf ball and stuffing is coming out.

I told mum who didn't say anything. I get it, at a loss for words, especially given how many negative reports I've given her recently about this kid. Her son started getting angry and saying horrible things as attention seeking in front of us both. I physically moved him because he wouldn't do as he was asked and she wasn't doing anything and I turned my back on him. I showed mum a photo of the damage and she didn't say anything. As she was leaving she mumbled and muttered with a half ass awkward embarrassed laugh saying send me the bill won't you. My response to my child behaving like this would have been , "Oh my goodness, I am soooo sorry. Please let me know how much it will cost to replace." I would be bending over backwards apologizing. Yes I may feel embarrassed of my child's behaviour, but I would make it very clear how sorry I was and would be looking to rectify things ASAP. Even more so given that we have had a business relationship for 5 years between both her kids.

I was going to try and fix it, maybe darn it with a thick synthetic thread...but who am I kidding. If the thread is to strong, it will just cause the material to rip on the other side of the original tear because of the tension. If I use a regular thread, it will snap. So much pressure is put on the area of the bed effected by my growing teenage daughter, inevitably this is going to break further, tomorrow, next week in a month, eventually. I don't have a spare grand to replace it, especially at this point two weeks before officially becoming unemployed.

So another parent drops off this morning, telling me how they'd bumped into a couple of kids last night. One was at the daycare centre they'd been to see as the other family had a back to back appointment. Then they were walking home past the ice cream store, and yes you guessed it. "That" kid and his sister and mother not much more than an hour after I told her what he'd done, were happily enjoying an ice cream cone each. WTF!?! I was absolutely livid when I found that out. I'm not suprised at all, but so annoyed because so many of his behavioural issues are as a result of being spoilt and lack of discipline and this is just the icing on the cake.

I was nervous about asking for such a high ticket item to be replaced, but screw it. It's in my contract that any damage incurred as a result of inappropriate play or malicious behaviour will be at their full expense to fix or replace.

I'm friends with this woman, and a few things over the last 6 months have had me questioning it. This is my breaking point. Kids will be kids, going through their naughty stages and I'm sure he'll grow out of it. Parents can parent their child anyway they see fit, but when their choices and actions result in things like this at my house, nobody should expect me to be polite about it.

I'm going to talk to her at the door today about how I'm going to get her a written quote from The Brick for a new mattress and she needs to pay me Monday for it. If it costs us our friendship and she gets all arsy with me, then it just further reinforces that this wasn't a positive person to have as a friend and just lets me know that she clearly has no morals.

I'm really disappointed and upset that my daycare work is ending with all of these behavioural issues and conflicts. I wanted so badly to have a lovely happy fun packed notice period to end this career chapter on a high with good memories.

[5 Little Monkeys]

That really sucks!! I'm sorry that it happened!

Hope you guys can come to a solution that makes both parties happy!

[bright sparks]

That really sucks!! I'm sorry that it happened!

Hope you guys can come to a solution that makes both parties happy!

I called Sealy to see if it's even feasible for it to be fixed and all the while not voiding the warranty. I'm waiting to hear back and hopefully before pick up time so I've got something to tell his mother.

[babydom]

You are not alone!! Although mine is worst. The neighbours kids broke the handle off of my seesaw little tikes slide climber. Cost 250$ for that and it was my daycare kids favorite. I was so upset. One it was WEEKS after I got rid of it when she said oh you got rid of the seesaw and I said well I had to someone broke the handle and it was dangerous for the kids. She was like oh ya that was my kid!!! One she didn't even tell me her kid did it. Two she didn't even say sorry and three I asked for a replacement and she is refusing. These big climbers are always out on my front lawn because our backyard is small. So I said well he can't play on them then if he's just going to break it. But like she's going to listen when I'm not around. This is the neighbour I gave countless free daycare for cuz they needed help. And now I just found out they came into a lot of money and she's bragging how they're going on a trip and buying another car. But yet you can't even buy my kids a new slide or repay me for all the free daycare. Urgh!! Sorry that's my rant. At least you have a contact and it's a daycare kid. Sooooo get the mom to replace it. Such selfish ppl in this world.....sigh!!!

[bright sparks]

That sucks! Although the mattress cost $1000 and it's in my contract for this parent to pay for replacement, I can't imagine what would happen if it was a neighbours kid!!

[babydom]

I know. That's what I was saying. I know your item costed more but at least u have it in writing to get the mom to pay. I should get my neighbour to sign something if she wants her kid to use my items. Lol

[playfelt]

As annoying as the parent's reaction is the problem is we are already being paid to supervise the children and that includes during naptime. So if we leave them unsupervised and they wake up and decide to play then it is really on us not the parents. At the same time getting up and playing with your daughter's toys or reading one of her books is one thing but doing what was done is wilful destruction but how long would the child have to have been awake unsupervised to do that degree of damage.

[kindertime]

I totally get that this isn't the point - but if Sealy isn't going to fix it and the mom doesn't cough up the money, (cuz, honestly, with only a couple more days till you close... why would she?) You could try a patch. I don't know if you can sew, but it's what I would try. Go to a fabric store and buy the smallest piece of upholstery fabric you can (maybe 1/4 yd) and make a patch. Tell the person at the store what you need, they might be able to help you. You are right, darning isn't an option, but a patch might work.

But seriously! To strip the bed and spend that much time doing that much damage, that's not normal. I don't think that's a phase. He's doing this stuff at home too. Gotta be! Good luck.

[kindertime]

Oh and if you did go that route, get an upholstery needle. They are curved for use on flat things where you can't pull through to the other side.

[bright sparks]

As annoying as the parent's reaction is the problem is we are already being paid to supervise the children and that includes during naptime. So if we leave them unsupervised and they wake up and decide to play then it is really on us not the parents. At the same time getting up and playing with your daughter's toys or reading one of her books is one thing but doing what was done is wilful destruction but how long would the child have to have been awake unsupervised to do that degree of damage.

I'm furious at the parents response to this behaviour by taking her kid to get ice cream. It is our responsibility to watch their child, but if it was intended for a child to be watched over for every single minute of naptime, rates would be higher and the ratio would be 1:1. Obviously this is impossible.

How many times as a provider left the room to pee and come back two minutes late to find all sorts of havoc has let loose. Also this is a naughty kid, who goes out of his way to be deceitful and he has a track record. I check every kid at least once an hour and should there be any noises, much more frequently. This child has been with me for over 3 years. One incident at naptime when he was on a nap mat on the floor was when he very quietly got up, removed his soiled diaper and smeared poo all over the carpet. Is that really as a result of me not doing my job properly? Or simply the reality of a caregiver seeing a child sleeping at routine checks and going about their other tasks for naptime. He has been sleeping in our rooms for over a year and there hasn't been a single incident. He gave me no cause for concern regardless of how he behaves during awake hours. I didn't charge this parent for the poop because it comes with the territory, but if I can not trust a child to lay down and sleep or rest, or do as they are told without fear of them being destructive, then what am I to do? Don't under estimate a child who is acting destructively with intent and full knowing that what they are doing. Sneaky and smart, even at this age. I've turned my back for a minute and seen him push a kid off the chair because my back is turned. I've heard this kid say to another kid when a chair was given up, "come and sit here quickly before so and so comes back" That is really nasty and malicious behaviour for a 4 year old. Fitted sheets, off in a minute or two maximum. Picking pulling at threads. He would have only had to have got to pulling just right to start that hole and the rest is history once he got his fingers in it.