At a loss

[jodaycare]

So I have an almost 3 yr old boy in care. His Mom got pregnant last fall then she lost her job in January. So she dropped him down to two days a week from four. He has been extremely upset pretty much every morning at drop off since Mom got pregnant. It doesnt seem to matter what I do or say he still has a rough time. Mom had the baby 3 weeks ago and I thought he would improve but nope. All day long he asks where Mom, Dad, baby etc are or says he wants to see them etc. i am truly at a loss. I am tempted to say that it isn't worth upsetting him so much and suggest that they take him out. But would that be mean?

[mickyc]

Part-time is hard on kids especially since mom is home with baby. This is one reason I don't take part-time anymore.

I would ask that he be moved to full time or you find a replacement.

[jodaycare]

I have been thinking the same thing but I know they can't afford full time and I have no idea how to suggest they pull him. The little guy will be going to school next Sept and I dont know whether they are planning on bringing the baby once Mom finds a new job. They currently live about 45 minutes away but Dad works in my city and Mom used to work about 20 minutes away. So everything depends on where Mom finds a job I guess.

[torontokids]

I would just be honest and let them know that he isn't adjusting well to being at daycare with reduced hours and knowing that mom is at home. I would give them a months notice and fill his spot with a full time child. It does not make sense to hold onto this spot for this family in case they might send their 2nd baby to you.

[mickyc]

It doesn't matter if they can afford the full time spot or not. Why are you taking a cut in pay to accommodate them? Honestly if you don't want to deal with it just tell them you need to fill the spot with full time as a business. Then the ball is in their court - full time or they pull him. Either way will help. Boy will get into routine if full time or be gone. Win win. Don't worry about the baby possibly coming. Families come and go and you have to look after you.

[jodaycare]

Thanks for all of your help. The boy has been with me since March of last year and never cried at drop off till Mom got pregnant. I honestly think it is attention seeking behaviour. I just don't know how to get him out of it. I will give it till Sept, then talk to his parents. Business wise I could really use a full time child.

[playfelt]

Sometimes you can explain things to the child in a way that they understand. Sometimes mommy gets extra tired because the baby wakes her up at night so she needs to take a nap in the daytime therefore he gets to come to your house and play because he isn't a baby anymore that needs two naps a day so baby and mommy are at home taking naps and daddy is at work and he is being a big boy with no morning nap playing with his friends.

[jodaycare]

I like that playfelt! I have tried the Big Boy thing but never thought of putting it that way. We talked about it today and he promised no tears on Thursday, so we will see.

[Van]

Tell us about it on Thursday and I hope there is a change soon ,good advice Playfelt

[Suzie_Homemaker]

I find lot of children struggle in day care when days dropped for mat leave. I not take PT children but I used to allow current FT children to reduce days for mat leave if return FT after. I no longer allow.

Routine home very different than here. Routine with new baby at home, very different. Older child struggles with back and forth two different routine esp if alternating week days between two places because child has no routine at all then.

Now, the option for mat leave parent are stay FT or leave completely and welcome to return if have FT place when they need it.

I can no longer hold their unwanted days as it big financial burden on me but it only way I can be sure there place for child to return to. I can no longer have disruption of unsettled child with no routine.

It not my issue if parent can't afford to stay FT for mat leave. It is my issue to operate at a certain capacity, to have a safe and calm environment for all client, and to make sure all children happy here, is learning socially, developmentally, educationally. That where my obligation ends.