Comforting Children

[torontokids]

So he had a much better day today. We had a small snack inside (the messy stuff e.g. yogurt) and I brought a bunch pf food outside to have. This made a huge difference! It is more of a pain and will cost me more money food wise but in the end it is worth it. I hope this was just not a coincidence and things continue to move in the right direction! He started to get upset but was also more easily redirected...who knew he may of just been "Hangry"

[CrazyEight]

I wonder that too. My handful tripped in my front yard yesterday, got the slightest scrape imaginable, didn't even bleed, and he was hollering like I was murdering him. I tried to calm him down, but he was waaaay past the point of no return. I didn't want the rest to have to come inside, so he was put on my front step to wail away. Every time a neighbour walked by I'd announce loudly "you're fine buddy, you only tripped, there's no need for a meltdown," or something like it, just so they wouldn't think he was actually hurt. If only he'd realize he's missing out on outside time for ridiculous reasons!

[mickyc]

Tantrums result in timeout here. I have zero tolerance for that sort of behavior. They must go sit in timeout until they are done. I do not acknowledge them while in timeout (tell them to quit etc). Most kids figure it out pretty quick and the tantrums stop. I had one boy though who was a nightmare and was excessively dramatic! Timeouts didn't work as well for him. I had to start being more creative. He didn't like being last at things so if he threw a tantrum then he would be last to go outside, last in line to wash hands, last one I gave lunch to etc.

I just feel there is no point in terminating a child for being difficult. I have yet to have a group without one "handful" so I might as well just keep the one I have already! Lol

[Elly]

I can understand giving timeouts for tantrums over 2 years old. The idea of a timeout in the playpen is a great idea, I've done that with my 2.5 year old and it works great! But how would you go about settling a 1 year old down?

[5 Little Monkeys]

I don't really do time outs for under 2's. I don't feel it's fair. They're young and don't know any better. Our job is to teach them the appropriate way to handle their anger and/or behaviour. We need to model behaviour for them. I use distraction or remove them from the area and use simple word instruction.

I try to remember that even children are allowed to be grouchy(aren't we all lol) but aggression is not so I focus more on that and less on "punishment" when they're that young

[torontokids]

So I did the same today with snack and we had a regular "melt down" morning outside. I put him in the wagon with a buckle when he started bawling about not getting his way or whatever. He cried and screamed for 15 mins or so. Came out, started wailing about a toy, went back in the wagon and the rest of the morning went better. So here's hoping! My neighbour is a teacher and so is off this summer and I got a weird look from her during all this...I find teachers can be kind of 'judgey" anyways but who knows.

He came in today super whiny. I am not sure if his parents realize how whiny their kid is. I know my daughter went through a whiny stage and I had gotten a bit used to it, it wasn't until someone had said something to me that I saw how bad it had gotten. Dad seemed to reinforce the whining though my snuggling him as he was whining away and asking "whats wrong?" etc. I said "Bobby talk like a big boy so we can help you." I think the dad might have caught on.

[babydom]

I do the same. My 1yrs sit on the step till they calm down. Seems to work well for me. They all understand after a few times

[mickyc]

Same here. Timeout for everyone. When you are done crying and settled down you can come out.

I don't use the playpen though. I don't want a child to dislike their playpen so it is never used for punishment. I have a spot on the floor by my laundry room door. Or if outside they sit by the door at the house. I actually had one boy put himself in timeout when he got upset. It was hilarious. He knew that was his spot to pout/feel mad/calm down.

[mickyc]

I am not sure about how I feel about a child being restrained while in a timeout (buckled in wagon, high chair or in playpen). Child should know that if you send them to a certain spot that they need to remain there until allowed out. I tell children having a tantrum that once they have calmed down they can join the group. I think buckling them in somewhere just causes more anxiety and the child to be more upset. I think of it more as more like giving them space/time to relax and collect themselves. It is similar to a timeout but not quiet the same. Not sure if that makes sense.

[torontokids]

I am not sure about how I feel about a child being restrained while in a timeout (buckled in wagon, high chair or in playpen). Child should know that if you send them to a certain spot that they need to remain there until allowed out. I tell children having a tantrum that once they have calmed down they can join the group. I think buckling them in somewhere just causes more anxiety and the child to be more upset. I think of it more as more like giving them space/time to relax and collect themselves. It is similar to a timeout but not quiet the same. Not sure if that makes sense.

I'll be honest, it is/was not easy for me to do it but I am kind of at the end of my rope here. I tried initially putting him in a spot to calm down and he wouldn't stay (after multiple attempts at putting him back) I put him in the wagon.