Good Lord! I HATE AP!!

[ottawamommy]

I have had it and I am at my wits end with dcgb!!!!!!!!!!!!!! She is AP (attachment parenting) and she is wild in every way imaginable!!

Please help

[Wonderwiper]

NEXT!!!

Seriously....I honestly couldn't deal with that! I have never terminated either but that kid would not have lasted that long here.

[babydom]

I have a list of NOT TAKES when it comes to interviewing.

1. Cop parents
2. Lawyer parents
3. CAS parents
4. AP parents

I do not even go there. I still to this day can't believe a parent would do this to a child!! How mean is it to set your little one up for failure when u know ur going back to work to parent that way then throw them in a group setting? So unfair to everyone involved...child and provider. Either stay home, don't do AP or only do it for 6mths then wean them or get a NANNY!

And for the record your a strong patience provider cuz there's no way I'd be doing a forth wk with another new child coming in.....lol. Good luck!!

[Lee-Bee]

Wouldn't giving the 4th week mean you no longer have the ability to terminate and keep the deposit?

[Lee-Bee]

I'll also use this chance to (once again) point out that AP gets a bad rap because a lot of parents today claim to be AP when really they are just lacking in the skills needed to be a parent and be in control. True AP parenting does not result in children that rule the house and control the parents every move...that is merely a family that has NOT set boundaries. AP is about setting those boundaries in a very gentle manner...AP is NOT about the lack of boundaries.

A TRUE AP child should not be sleep deprived and should not be eating only a select foods that they demand. That is a child that has be given complete control. This is something that pisses me off, don't use AP as an excuse not to parent and not to prepare children for the real world. Life is going to SUCK for these children when they grow up and learn that they aren't the rulers of the universe.

[Suzie_Homemaker]

I have had it and I am at my wits end with dcg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! She is AP (attachment parenting) and she is wild in every way imaginable. Even when she eats she deliberately looks at me (complete eye contact) SPITS her food out at me and makes a movement thing with her lips and smiles after I say no!!!!!!!WHENEVER food is involved!!

I have asked the parents to start getting her to sleep independently and I don't think they have because there has been no improvement with napping in the last 3 weeks. We have one good day and 4 shit days. It don't think it's my job to suffer and loosing 10 years of my life dealing with a wild child if they are at home rocking and carrying!!!

I asked today if she is sleeping independently and they told me they co sleep with her. Which I think is complete bull-shit they are still rocking her and I don't even know if this co sleeping thing is any good.

I have never in my career had to terminate a child and I feel really bad but my nerves are shot!

In my contract it states word for word "In the case that a child is not properly adjusting to daycare within a 3 week timeframe, the provider may terminate the contract and retain the full deposit"

I am giving them one more week (4 weeks in total) and I think that's fair. I have a new child starting next week too that I have transition as well so I don't think it's fair to the new child either.

Although agree if you had enough, you should term, be careful.

If your contract say you can term if not adjust in 3 weeks, and keep deposit, and you wait until week 4, it might be that you have give normal notice and apply deposit as would with long term person leaving.

[ottawamommy]

I shake when she comes here lol
I'm so tired!

[babydom]

My understanding is that co sleeping is apart of AP as they are always attached to the parent. Isn't AP also mean child led? So lee-bee doesn't AP parents give in and do what their child wants to keep them happy? That's how I understood it. Lol. Please clarify as I love to learn about parenting styles.

[Lee-Bee]

Co-sleeping is merely having your child(ren) sleep in your bed or in a bed beside your bed. It is very much AP BUT boundaries still need to be established for it to be functional for EVERY one involved. Meaning the child needs to learn that whether they want to or not they NEED to sleep. Yes, they can wake and seek comfort but that comfort should be something like a quick pat on the back or a 'shh' from the parent not hour long entertainment and rocking etc.

I had one AP family oh man. They were great people but man. The kid was up for 3-4hours in the night every night. Dad would rock her and he would sleep in the chair all night (the kid was over a year old) I remember mom texting me one morning saying they had a rough night but hey managed to get the child to sleep most the night, as long as the child was able to keep her finger in dad's belly button all night. WTF! that is complete and utter control of the child. How is that comfortable for the father. WHY is the child's comfort (aka finger in belly button) above the dads comfort (sleeping at all, and without a finger in his belly button).

Sometimes people you need to close the door and let the child cry themselves to sleep.
I say this as a parent that never left my child to cry it out. I taught her how to sleep and self sooth at an early age so we didn't have to either cry it out OR all be sleep deprived. This meant I didn't start sleep habits that SUCK when the child is older. Sure rock a 2month old to sleep but don't rock your 10month old to sleep because then you have to rock your 18month old to sleep. It takes time and effort and a whole lot of effort but as a parent you sign up for the responsibilities of raising a child. You don't have children so they can control your every move and keep you up for hours every night. Being a parent means saying NO (endlessly), being firm, being mean and being hated (at times) it is in the best interests of our children.

Again, I state this is NOT AP parenting. this is parenting without boundaries and the inability to take control!

I think your option of going home for naps is PERFECT. They created this mess they can deal with it.

[Lee-Bee]

My understanding is that co sleeping is apart of AP as they are always attached to the parent. Isn't AP also mean child led? So lee-bee doesn't AP parents give in and do what their child wants to keep them happy? That's how I understood it. Lol. Please clarify as I love to learn about parenting styles.

NO! That's just what we have turned it into.
It is about being in tune with our child. It is not about being physically attached to them 24/7 till they go to school and it is not about them controlling everything.

It is about holding them when they need comfort. It is being kind and gentle...sure you can avoid the word "no" but you don't let them do anything they want...you redirect and guide them to what you want them to do without being harsh etc. It does not mean they can do anything they want.

AP still has discipline but it is about being preventative instead of reactive. It is about taking the time to use the situation as a learning opportunity but you STILL DISCIPLINE.

Most of all, AP still means the mom (and dad) take time to care for themselves and meet their own needs). AP is not about putting the child first and neglecting everyone else. That just leads to a complete breakdown of the family.

Like I say AP has a bad rap because we have turned it into something that is detrimental to the child and family.