Yes, always respond with "let me get back to you on that" when a parent makes a request. Doesn't matter how simple the request. Wait till they are gone so you can think it through clearly before committing to anything!
Unfortunately they are raising a child in a manner that means he will be helpless and dependent for much longer than necessary. They will either need to continue to pay for outside care to manage 2 kids or shape up and train the kids to be independent so they aren't doing everything.
It is sad, yes, that they have made it so they truly don't feel they can handle caring for their own 2 kids at the same time but that is the sad reality of their parenting style.
If your remembrance day is a paid day off it NEVER makes any sense to willingly take one child. You are now working for the same money you would get for not working. If the situation truly arises where it is reasonable to request care on a paid day off then you need to charge at least time and a half...if not double pay. That said, you already agreed to it and it would be unfair to change your mind now. Just ensure in the future you do not respond in the moment and think it through before committing and then make sure you are being paid for your time!!
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