I think ultimately you need to do what works best for your family and then the families comfortable with that will sign up. Some want the full out daycare segregated daycare areas while others prefer the full home with toys spread throughout.

I started with the fully finished basement that was solely daycare. The kids never entered the house aside from going up for nap.

When I downsized I completely left the basement behind and we took over the house. This allowed me to tend to the house during the day (with only 2 kids). Every room is still set up for the main family but has kids stuff integrated. The family room is for the trains and at time big play house). The guest room has all the toy shelves and is more or less a playroom. My daughters room has all the books (they snuggle in bed and read). We half sacrificed our diningroom (still has the table and chairs) as it now has the kid sized tables and shelves for puzzles, games and small toys.

Everything has it's place at the end of the day and doesn't scream "kids have taken over" but the kids can easily access their toys.

There is no reason to be eating around a kids table if you don't want to. Get a real table set up, grab some booster chairs for the kids that need it. Get some bins, baskets and small shelves to store the toys on. Find some creative places throughout the house to tuck away toys. We have a bin under the end tables, beside the couch near the wall etc.