4 years old and in diapers

[Busy ECE mommy]

I don't generally toilet train until the parents have spent a full week of consecutive days at home with the child to learn the process. This child may be developmentally delayed. If the child doesn't have the self help skills at age 4, then I wonder... They need to be able to pull own pants up&down and communicate that they need to go or have already gone. With heavier kids, I don't lift them on&off the toilet, I give them a stool and they do it by themselves. It doesn't sound like he's ready. I'd put the responsibility on the parents to do the training for now, and yes, he needs to use underwear, as pullups are diapers.

[planet.caravan67]

I don't generally toilet train until the parents have spent a full week of consecutive days at home with the child to learn the process. This child may be developmentally delayed. If the child doesn't have the self help skills at age 4, then I wonder... They need to be able to pull own pants up&down and communicate that they need to go or have already gone. With heavier kids, I don't lift them on&off the toilet, I give them a stool and they do it by themselves. It doesn't sound like he's ready. I'd put the responsibility on the parents to do the training for now, and yes, he needs to use underwear, as pullups are diapers.

I have begun to suspect child may be, because he is quite immature for his age, the games he likes to play, how he speaks seem a lot more similar to what a 3 yr old would do. But then again that can be related to how he is treated at home as mom was home till now with child and just got back to work - really makes me wonder why she hasn't trained him yet. I suspect he may be very much babied.
I have decided parents will have responsibility of doing it and once they are successful at home I will help out as well.

[Suzie_Homemaker]

I have begun to suspect child may be, because he is quite immature for his age, the games he likes to play, how he speaks seem a lot more similar to what a 3 yr old would do. But then again that can be related to how he is treated at home as mom was home till now with child and just got back to work - really makes me wonder why she hasn't trained him yet. I suspect he may be very much babied.
I have decided parents will have responsibility of doing it and once they are successful at home I will help out as well.

This will make big difference. Normally my daycare children come to me at 12 month and stay until school time. I not had many come after 2 for sure. Even those babied at home are not babied her. My objective is to teach skill for independance. This maybe why 2nd birthday be magic time for training here? They know here that expectation are different and most child will reach for goal with positive encouragement. I not had many child developmentally delayed - I think only one. And that was short term place as Mom was having new baby and going on mat leave.