A little bit of a vent but I need your opinion

[Snowmom]

7 years ago, I could have written this exact post.

Because it's family, it's hard to separate the business relationship from the family relationship because the ramifications of HOW these parents "parent" their child will impact you and your family directly (depending of course on how close your families are and how much time you spend together).

To me, there's a direct correlation between the bad behavior and how much time is spent (or not spent) with Mom and Dad. The kids act out because it's the only way Mom and Dad will pay attention to them.

If I could go back and tell myself to NOT take on my inlaw's kids, I totally would. Because now, I can't stand to be in the same room with them, which is a sore spot with my husband and me as well as my MIL (she doesn't see the problem). My kids also think it's unfair that their cousins are Grandma's "favorites" because Grandma always picked up their cousins from my house (and not my kids) and they have their own room at Grandmas (they stay THAT much). It breaks my heart.

Yes, you'll never change them. Yes, you should treat them as you would any other client (although it's HARD). But, my advice beyond that, is to think about how it's affecting YOU, your relationships and your family life. If it's having a negative impact, let them go!