Advice on extremely high anxiety child

[Lee-Bee]

Is the younger child in physiotherapy? How often does she go? Doesn't much matter what the parents call it (lazy etc) if they are bringing her the therapist will look past the parents label. The fact they bring her means there is hope!

There comes a point where you just need to care for yourself and the other children. So if you can't terminate (financially) and the parents are in denial then you can't force it. Do what you need to do to survive the day. It is unfortunate for the child but until the family comes around there really isn't much for anyone to do. Be very consistent. Give a warning, then remove the child into his alone, dark, quiet, safe place until he is ready to join the group.

There is no winning the food battle. If he only wants those 2 foods and you don't serve them he is out of luck. Remove him if needed. If the parents were seeking help and were having him properly assessed then I might suggest having them send him foods that he does eat. Some children with certain diagnosis really can't handle many textures and tastes so it isn't just being picky...but you can't assess this on your own. That said, if you feel his being hungry everyday is making your day worse then maybe just have them send his mac and cheese. While the wrong move health wise...it might make your life easier if a full belly limits the tantrums.

It sucks...you are one person and their needs are way more than you can handle. Do what you need to make it through the day and don't try to fix it all on your own. Your focus here needs to be you...so you can care for the group as a whole. When the family starts to recognize and identify the issues at hand then you can step up your game.

If you can find children to fill these spaces it might be worth terminating. Maybe you can find another sibling pair that will need care when a different mom goes off mat leave in the coming months...then you can fill the space now and give enough notice to this family. If you do...strongly suggest a center for them where there are more resources.

Also...it is really hard for a parent to travel for work and if this child is showing signs of having some sort of condition/disorder then it would really really shake his life up so it is natural that he reacts poorly both during and after her return. Despite his age. Look past his age because he may really not have the understanding that mom is coming back soon. Once back he may be in fear she will randomly leave again and just not know how to express that. Accept it and just deal with it how you can...instead of expecting him to not react.