The other problem is that they are my long term reference. And families can be a long time coming in this area, so I would rather have a replacement lined up. I also want to give them a good amount of notice. But how do i replace them without them knowing? I live in a realatively small rural community, most providers and parents use local facebook groups to find each other. I had to term another family for not paying me, among other things, so I'm not going to ask them for a reference. I feel like I don't have a lot of options.

I wanted to say thank you to everyone who replied. This is all great advice. I've just learned about this forum and have found it to be a great resource already. It's so great to have the supportI knew this job would be hard work but it's way more complicated than I thought it would be!