Toddler hitting

[kindredspirit]

I have a dcb coming tomorrow (has been here 4 times, comes every 1-2 weeks as relief for his mom). He is 2.5yo and aggressive. In front of me, he has dropped a large rock on a 1.5yo, repeatedly kicked a 1.5yo, hit his older brother (hands and with objects) and narrowly missed my baby on 3 occasions (with his foot about to step on her back, and with pushing toys, about to go over hands).

Each incident, I stopped his activity, took him to the side and talked about why the behaviour was not tolerated. After he expressed understanding, I either redirected him to appropriate activities (in the near misses), ended the activity (after the rock we all went inside) or put him to bed (the kicking/hitting was during story before nap).

I just got a message from his mom that he has been on meds for an ear infection all week. He is better, and was back to usual activities today, but he has been hitting her and his brother frequently. Her method is to sit with him on the stairs until he apologizes. She said to try whatever I think will work because her way isnt working.

Any tips??

[Van]

Time out can help , if we are outside and one child needs time out he can sit somewhere safe
that way the other children can still play outside and he can sit out rather than take all the children in because of one child being aggressive- Good Luck

[Suzie_Homemaker]

I rare do time out and it only used for intending to hurt. Hit, bite, etc. Because it rare here it a bit shocking to child to be put in time out.

Like you, I normally, redirect, catch child before, verbally remind if I see something headed so I do time out very different to add to the shock.

I get hold of child and move to time out at quick pace. I plop them in time out and very direct comment like "No hitting" and move away. They stay in time out and then I pick activity that child loves for everyone else do.

When time out done I keep to simple statement. "we not hurt people in Miss Suzie's house" and then child has different toy while others do child's favourite activity.

Shock of be in time out, shock of Miss Suzie not talking lot, upset of being excluded from favourite activity all add to message that not okay to hurt. But must be consistent. Make sure to pay extra attention to victim not perpetrator - lot time, hurting for attention so I make sure focus my attention everywhere but the instigator. Helps be quicker resolve if parent on board too.

[kindredspirit]

This pair has been downright exhausting today! With careful observation I was able to remove toys of conflict and redirect, but I don't like hovering. The older has issues with food and transition, and the young one is so destructive I can't put my 10mo down out of my reach. I had to stagger her sleep today so she slept before and after his nap. This was their last day of the summer, and I'll be telling the parents I'm full for Sept. No more!!!

[mickyc]

That is why it's hard to take a child on such random times. It's exhausting as they don't know or follow daycare routine.