Quote Originally Posted by bright sparks View Post
She can expect what she likes, but ultimately it is up to you to set the tone for what is acceptable. Make a choice. She can expect it but it is down to you to make a choice and stick with it. You set the tone for her expectations based on your actions. I don't think punishment works with this type of thing either, but that is because I have experience and I tried the punishment route and it only caused more frustration for ME, and didn't make a damned bit of difference to the childs toileting.
I totally understand what you're saying,maybe it's different when it's your own child. I can deal with the odd accident, say, if we were out and he didn't get there on time or something like that. But when it's a daily/every other day thing and I'm constantly cleaning up a whole bowel movements/urine from him, it gets a bit frustrating.

It's hard because we love to go to the park after school and play, since we have been having good weather days lately. But we can't because he is always having accidents. Also, I am thinking towards the summer and when we go on all morning outings to parks/splashpads and programs farther from us. I can't have him pooping in his pants every time we go out somewhere nor am I going to bring everyone home because he can't control himself.

I just have to figure out if I'm willing to deal with this any further or terminate.