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It was Better When...
a Rant for Friday morning.
Last edited by kindertime; 10-07-2017 at 11:44 AM.
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I don't think technology is the real blame. Somewhere along the road parents decided that they want to be their child's friend. Everyone wants to give their child what they never had growing up (like you said the fond childhood memories of who the cool kids were and the desire to be one). So now we have children who are given what they want when they want it with no real discipline at home. Parents put on rose colored glasses and think their child is so amazing and never do anything wrong. Not sure what was the cause but I imagine like everything it was a slow process. Personally as a parent I work hard to be a parent and discipline my daughter. Technology doesn't really hinder that for us. Just my thoughts
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The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to mickyc For This Useful Post:
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Starting to feel at home...
I feel the same way!! I will be turning 40 in May and I feel like the whole dynamic of kid's childhoods has changed so much. I actually feel sorry for them.
The whole face to face communication thing is totally lost...it's all texting and face timing, ect...
And I won't even get into the whole helicopter parenting and the "no winners or losers", no competition...becaus e god knows we don't want some kid to feel like they're not the best! What is going to happen to these poor kids when they get into the real world!
They grow up so fast and I totally agree with the video game thing. I've had dck's that were 6 and 7 and say they were playing Halo and Call of Duty!
I'm just glad that I was raised in the 70's and 80's when life was simpler
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The Following User Says Thank You to mattsmom For This Useful Post:
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I agree for the most part, though every generation seems to consider their childhood and generation to be better than the last. It used to drive my grandmother crazy when people referred to the 30's - 40's as the "good old days", she would always ask what was so good about it (considering that was the time of the Great Depression and life was hard). People are also nostalgic though.
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Can you imagine how confusing it must be for some of these kids when they hit the 'real world' whether that is kindergarten, grade school ,high school, the workplace etc. No one is perfect at everything and some people just really suck at many things. We do no service lying to them and telling them they are the best. Sure, we need to find heir strengths and build on that but we still do need to recognize and point out that they aren't great at everything.
Just the other day my husband beat my 2 yr old in a race up the stairs. She lost. He pointed it out to her. He was the winner, she came in second because she wasn't as fast.
It was the funniest thing to see...and grown man telling a 2 yr old he was faster and the winner. But, I sat there realizing that most kids miss out on such life lessons! He would have done her no service pretending to be slower and making her the winner. Of course, sometimes she does win because that provides incentive to keep trying but no one can win all the time.
Anyways, I would guess that every generation complains about things being different then when they were young, just the nature of how things change in society. But I do believe the current generation is being screwed in many ways! This is largely due to the fact that the last generation was raised in a manner that makes most of them feel the need to not parent in a manner that involves saying 'no', being the boss and just being firm when needed. At some point when things get really messed up a generation will realize they need to swing things back to raising kids in a firm manner.
My 2 yr old DCG girl showed up at the door with a canister of hot chocolate this morning. An open canister. She was covered head to toe. Yep...that's how they got her out of the door this morning by caving to her demand to bring it with her. She, of course, took the lid off and played with it in the car. I couldn't help but think, you could say no, hot chocolate stays in the kitchen. Yes, she'd cry but your car and child wouldn't be covered in powder! This beats the time she showed up with a purple popsicle at 8am, in the winter. Because that's what got her out the door. It went straight in my sink Because I have no interest in a toddler with a purple popsicle in my house. Eyeroll.
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Starting to feel at home...
Funny you mention that Lee-Bee, just the other day, one of my dcb showed up with his 'breakfast'. It was a bowl of syrup covered waffle, covered in chocolate chips and mini marshmallows. This was at 8am. Mom told me this was bribery so he wld take his medicine that morning. It went straight into the trash needless to say .....smh.
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I don't think it technology to blame. I think it fear.
When I was little girl, traveling was not as easy as it is today and so many generations of family remained in small geographical area. Families know other families. If a stranger in town, some one would know his story, his background.
Now that no longer true. Even me come from other County. I sure other posters too not from Canada or who parent not from Canada. So, we no longer know who in our communities, we no longer have people we know long time, vouching for strangers. Everyone a stranger and with that come suspicions.
Just maybe 30 year ago, all the kid play outside and most houses have a mom at home. As kid move around neighborhood in big group of friends, there always an adult eye on them, watching over, keeping safe, and yelling at them if about to do something too stupid or risky.
Now, the adults no longer home. Bigger living cost, single parent families, not living in community with family close by, all contribute to no adult watching over kids. And with everyone being a stranger, parent not sure who to trust. Because can't be home to watch own children, false sense of protection in making sure kids come straight home from school and lock themselves in house until parent finish work.
This hurts everyone.
The kids don't learn natural consequences in safe environment with friends. When kid being a jerk, friends will put in place, or exclude for short while and kids soon learn to be nice, kind and get along with others. These important lessons being missed out because kids not get chance to try on different personalities in safe environment to find out who they are. They not develop life skills in co-operation and communication. They not learn if they take risk and climb to high up tree, then they fall out. They not learn boundaries for respecting others and also for unnecessary chances - natural selection.
Instead, we teach kids not to interact. To be wary of adult vs respectful. Not long ago, it was fair for any adult in neighborhood to allocate job to any kid. If old lady need help unpacking shopping from trunk, it fine to grab any kid from street to help. If adult here bad language from youth, it fair game for any adult to clip kid behind ear and tell them off. Not now. Now parent would attack adult who corrected their kid. Parent would sue adult who grabbed thieving youth by scruff of neck.
So now, now accountability. Youngers not corrected by community of adults who see bad behavior when parent not there. Youth cocky about being untouchable and beyond reprimand. Younger kids isolated in basement until adults come home and so only interacting with adults in adult World and no chance to develop and grow skills with peers.
No trust in communities because everyone a stranger and no way to change when all adults working and not get chance to meet people living close by.
All living individual lives which intersect in public places but don't really connect.
Kids no respect for parent who rarely available. Parent available to kid from 5.30pm until bedtime only but kids peers contactable 24x7 instantly on touch screen. This why kids value friends more than families.
It not technology that killed way we've lived for generations - it fear.
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I believe a lot of it can be lamed on tiredness. Nowadays many families need both parents to work in order to make ends meet. Or a single parent must work more then one job. When they get home kids test as they usually did "back in the day" and instead of putting the hard work in a lot of times parents just give in. I also believe that with the technology when something bad happens we hear about it right away so it puts fear in people as Susie homemaker stated so they are scared to let their kids go out and play. The thing is that danger was always there however we just didn't hear about it as often.
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The Following User Says Thank You to Teagansmom For This Useful Post:
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Euphoric !
I just wish for the time when parents didn't cave in to their child's every whim. This a.m. dcg comes in and decides she wanted to bring something she had earlier told her parent she didn't want to bring. Instead of making this a teachable moment and the parent telling child they had made the decision not to bring the item, therefore, she needed to deal with not having it, the parent texted the other parent to bring item to d/c so child could have it. Sure enough, 20 minutes later other parent shows up with item and proudly gives it to child and looking at me as if saying "see what a wonderful parent I am?" The kicker is, the dcg never even looked at it and I stuffed item in her back pack to take home.
I just want to see some parents grow a back bone with their kids and let the kids feel consequences for their actions.
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The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to mimi For This Useful Post:
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Originally Posted by homeschoolmom
I took a look, and what the boy is saying is 'brick'. In basketball, throwing a 'brick' means a bad throw, as if the ball was as heavy as a brick.
Phew!!! Thank you. Although it's a little embarrassing to be wrong, (I'm very used to it by now) I am glad that I was. Okay so brick makes a lot more sense. I still think the overall theme and tone of the commercial is awful, but I am glad they didn't make that cute little kid (the actor) say that word.
Thanks for correcting me, I was thinking about making a formal complaint to someone.
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