What would you do or say?

[godsgirl]

Hey Ladies!
I will try to keep this short. I recently have found out that I am pregnant and my husband and I decided to go to private so that we could accommodate all of our existing clients (as licensed your own children count towards the numbers). We decided to do this sooner than later because we figured why wait, we wanted/need the extra cash, plus it would save the families money as well. Plus, we wanted to do the transition before one of my families other child starts with us so that we could save the family the headache of registering her with the agency. I am 2 weeks away from being private and I'm actually pretty excited. Everyone has decided to stay with me and have all been super supportive.

Well.....my husband is in the military and everyone knows what type of life that involves (aka moving every couple of years) however we are very unhappy with this lifestyle and my husband has a chance to have an interview with a company this week that could really reset our whole life AND it could bring us back to all of our family. It really could be good for our family. Especially with baby #2 coming in January. We have obviously decided to not say anything until he for sure gets the job and we know the details of him leaving the military for obvious reasons (there's no point in getting everyone worked up if it doesn't happen - however I have a feeling that it will and that when it does it will happen fast. Probably by October).

My question is: what would you say or do? When would you tell the families if it does happen? How much details would you give them?

I hate this because I would have never gone private if I would have known this would happen. Plus, one of my families and I had made an agreement that they would send their oldest child full time in order to hold a space for their youngest who will be starting in September because I was losing the income by keeping the space open. So I feel EXTREMELY guilty about the possibility of not being able to follow through.

I know that I ultimately have to take care of me and my family first (they would do the same). I also know that they would understand. But still.

I'm tempted to just say that hubby was posted to save from any questions as they know that that is all part of his job and know that it's out of our hands. However, I hate the thought of telling a white lie to people that I truly care about.

Thoughts? Advice?

(I know, I should just deal with it, if and when it happens but I gotta wrap my head around this and have an action plan if it does happen).

TIA

[mickyc]

Say nothing until it is a guarantee. How much notice do you need to give according to your contract ? I say give a month's notice. Too long and you risk people pulling their kids early but you don't want to leave them scrambling last minute either.

As far as your husbands job you don't even need to say anything other than you are moving because of your husbands work

[Lee-Bee]

I'd give a months notice, more if you are willing and able to lose clients before the move. It's up to you what you say about the reason for the move. Keep in mind whether or not your parents would be chatting with you for the last month...are they the type to ask where you are going and how you feel about it etc? If so then just tell the truth...your husband felt it best to switch careers so you all can stay in one home, near family when you have 2 children. They may get annoyed at first but it's just a fact of home daycare.

[playfelt]

I think another issue here is if it is fair to the families who are leaving the agency to not know. Is there a way to put off the going private date till Dec as in just before the baby is born and it matters to numbers. That way if the move happens you wouldn't have misled the families.

[godsgirl]

I think that is my biggest dilemma with all of this play felt is that I feel bad for making them leave the agency and also for this one family who we agreed would send their oldest in order to hold the youngest space in September. I did all of this to try and simplify things and now if this happens it's all messed up. I think I would tell the family that I am holding the space for as soon as we find out (if we find out) and release her from our agreement ASAP and let her know that I am totally open to providing care until we leave but completely understand if they left sooner. I obviously would tell the other families once I knew everything as well. However, I'm not too concerned with them as much as I know they would stay until the end. One family is on mat leave and sends her daughter for the break and the other family will be ending school around then as well so the break would come naturally for her as well.

I'm totally at a loss for words because up until a handful of days ago everything was running smoothly and now all because of one conversation with someone my whole world is flipped upside down. I totally wish that I could back out of going private but we are literally 10 days away and everyone has already given their notices to the agency, filled out all of the contracts, paid deposits, new equipment has been purchased, etc. I feel like I'm too far past the point of backing out.
Maybe I'm just worrying for nothing and he won't get the job but I'm panicking a little bit.

[mickyc]

What I will say is to just carry on as if that conversation never happened. The best thing to do is focus on things that are guaranteed. The job interview is just that an interview. My husband just had an interview last week and we thought he was for sure going to get it as the Head Manager mentioned he would like to hire my husband right then and there but the other people at the interview said they had to have a meeting about it first. He never got a call back. I did the "what if" thoughts too in my head. We even thought we might decide to move to the town instead of my husband driving. It is hard to not know what the future will hold sometimes but everything will work out how it is supposed to so just relax and go with the flow!! When things are a guarantee then take the necessary steps.

[Lee-Bee]

I agree with Mickyc until your husband signs a contract there is no other job. Until then you need to move ahead with your daycare plans. Try not to worry about the possible changes ahead until they are actually going to be taking place.

[5 Little Monkeys]

I'm a planner and like to think ahead, especially with my business. I would have a rough idea of what I wanted to do/say IF your husband gets the job. Try not to focus too much energy onto it quite yet until he has the job for sure though.

If your husband gets the job than be honest with your families. Unfortunately the timing may be bad for some of them (in regard to leaving the agency) but it's a risk all parents should know they are taking when they choose home daycares. Your life comes first and the business second. They will hopefully understand!

[godsgirl]

Thank you guys!!
I think I just needed to hear it from somebody else. It's out of my hands until something concrete happens so why worry about something that may or may not happen.
I love this group!! Helps me get my head back in the game!!