Behaviour Management for 1 year old

I just started a 12 month old yesterday. She is a super great girl. First day was great, no problems, napped when I put her down. Today she is testing me! Which is completely normal. I just want to nip it in the bud from day one. She's starting to hit, whine, and play with things that she knows she isn't supposed to. Like the edge corner protectors. She keeps pulling them off and chewing on them. She smiles as soon as I notice she's pulled them off again so she knows for sure that she isn't supposed to play with them.

Also how the heck do I get her to sit for one song or one book! She's all over the place! Again I know this is totally normal. I have an almost 3 year old that I don't think I started early enough teaching him boundaries and I'm paying for it now.

Any advice is much appreciated!

I feel your pain Olivetree. I too had a little 12 month old (& her sibling, who is almost 4) who both started with me 6 weeks ago. For the first 2 weeks I felt like I needed 6 eyes to keep watch on her...and 6 arms to keep redirecting her. Now, a firm "No Sophia" works pretty well but she's also improved a lot in knowing her boundaries.
Re: "Also how the heck do I get her to sit for one song or one book! She's all over the place!"... You really got me thinking...I currently just let both of the 1 year-olds just play and wander during circle time...they do wander in for parts. I do make time for 1 on 1 learning with them at other times of the day so I don't worry about it.

I didn't even try to start including the 1 year olds in activities until they were 15months. Then I also started the time outs and such.
Let them wander. invite them, have them sit, but don't try too hard they force the subject. they don't really have the mental capacity right now. As the for the chewing. consistency will win out in the end.

At one, I would hardly expect her to sit down at specific times and listen to songs and stories. Some kids love it, but so many of them don't have the attention.
When it comes to her testing you, I think you just have to ride it out. Set some clear expectations and enforce them. She will pick up pretty quickly that you have certain rules in your house. I think she probably is testing her limits, to see how far you will let her go. When she is doing something the first couple times, redirect her attention to another toy or activity. When she starts to do it just to piss you off, lol (you can tell, when they look at you with the devil in their eyes!) then implement whichever method of discipline you use.

I don't expect my 1 year olds to sit for circle time but I do try to encourage it. I usually start by putting them on my knee but I don't force them to stay there. Eventually they'll start staying longer and longer as they see the others do it. As for unwanted behaviour...Consiste ncy and repetition is the key. they'll get it.

Today has made me seriously question my decision to start this business! All 3 kids have been very seriously testing me!

DCG is 12 months, she is hitting, biting, getting into everything that she knows is not ok (I don't have a lot around here that is off limits) but she manages to find the couple of things that are and seriously looks at me and smiles "with the devil in her eye"!

My son, who is almost 3, is acting out like I never thought possible. He tried climbing the stove, he sat in the middle of the road for our walk today and would not get up, he stood on a basket to pull things off the top shelf of a bookshelf and dropped a toy on DCG's head, steals toys from the babies, he's now starting to hit, fake cry like the babies do, won't sit for meals or snacks, decided he doesn't need naps anymore so screams his head off and wakes up DCG, and is all around driving me up the wall!!

My 10 month old daughter is whining like crazy. Not entirely sure why as she has always been a very independent little girl. She's getting angry that she can't walk like DCG.

I honestly have just been trying to do a little circle time as I feel like they are getting bored with so much free play which is making them misbehave. I've been trying to just sing as we play and they love that.

I'm not sure the best way to discipline, I think 1 is too young for time outs. I'm hoping that consistency will start working soon. Every time she gets into something I say firmly "no A**", when she hits I take her hand and say "gentle A**" and show her gentle. She knows that she's wrong, cause she smiles wickedly! It's actually really cute if it wasn't so terrible!

As for my son, time-outs don't work, nor does taking away his toys. He's just crazy LOL!

Please tell me it gets better! AND SOON!

Play pen, play yard or exersaucer for time outs for a one year old. You touch you get trapped.

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Originally Posted by playfelt

Play pen, play yard or exersaucer for time outs for a one year old. You touch you get trapped.

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Thank you for the advice. How long would you keep them in there? And what if they are screaming their head off? I really want to be in control here, I'm not right now and I can't be a good provider if I don't figure it out!

Thank you!

Yikes - sounds like you really did have a bad day and earned your paycheque today. (hugs)

She is too small for circle time. One year olds might come and see what is happening and then leave and then come back again but they don;'t have the span to sit through it.

Also...she likes the reaction she gets from you when you say "No ---". I also had a 1 year old start and she kept going for the outlet covers. She would reach a finger for it and know I was going to shake my head and say no....so she would do it and then shake her head with a smile mimicking the reaction she knew was coming. She also grinned the whole time so I could see it was a game for her and she was trying to engage me.

Picking her up and putting her somewhere else and redirecting worked. This is the age where they think dropping something and seeing you pick it up is fun and peek-a-boo. She just doesn't get that the reaction she is getting from you is not positive. She is just happy to have the power of getting a response and chances are that if she is touching all the unsafe stuff she is getting a pretty good reaction from you in terms of the pitch in your voice etc. It is very exciting in her little world.

The only way to deal with it is to keep saying no, redirecting and after a few days she will get tired of it.

The other issue with starting a baby is often that the older kids regress. Suddenly they are torn between being big kids and realizing that they don;t get away with the same behaviour anymore as the baby and regress and act more baby-like. Getting the kids involved in taking care of the baby sometimes helps.

Just be firm and don't let your son get out of routines that he had before. Let him know that expectations are still the same as they have always been in terms of him eating, sleeping, playing etc.

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Originally Posted by olivetree

Thank you for the advice. How long would you keep them in there? And what if they are screaming their head off? I really want to be in control here, I'm not right now and I can't be a good provider if I don't figure it out!

Thank you!

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I can't even imagine giving a time out to a 1 year old. Are we talking a 12 month old ?
The purpose of a time out is for the child to reflect on the behaviour.
What is the point of a time out at that age where a child cannot process that actions have consequences yet, have no self awareness and cannot reflect or correct themselves? It is not the same as giving a 2 or 3 year old a time out where they can communicate and understand