UPDATE: 4 yo naptime tantrums

After much contemplation we have had a change of plans with my 4yo dcg who screams, cries, jumps etc during naptime. I could have stood my ground until the cows come home, it wasn't going to change. We sat down together like 2 big people and talked about problems and solutions. I guided her into leading the conversation stating her "problem" and suggestion "solutions" that we could agree to. In the end she now has her mattress downstairs (they sleep up in the rooms) with a relaxation CD during which she may not get up or make any noise. She is actually resting longer than when she was offered her Leapster but had to go upstairs.
I also stressed how this change is NOT due to her tantrums, but due to her sitting down and talking it through. She understood that if she screamed for candies, she doesn't get it. If she screams for toys, she doesn't get them. She "gets" to stay downstairs because we had a problem and we found a solution.
She's very proud of herself for her last few rests. I wouldn't go that far as saying I'm proud of her, but it's a whole lot more peaceful around here.

Wow! What a mature little girl and a neat way to solve your problem. Congratulations! :)

I think that is an absolutely fantastic solution!! Compromise is sometimes necessary. Now you still get your down time, and she is allowing her body to recharge, but still gets treated like the bigger kid that she is.
Great job. :D

Awesome news - definitely find when children are a part of the brainstorming a solution to a problem it often has longer lasting results and they often surprise us and pick solutions we would not have - she actually chose a solution where she is resting BETTER cause music is better for recharging the brain than a Leapster ;)

Good for you for finding a way to get through to this little girl! I'm glad she was receptive to finding a solution with you.

That's great!

I am happy and it is working and it's fair for a 4 year old. But, I have to admit that I'm not totally satisfied. I would have preferred her to still go upstairs and do it. But, I know that I'm as stubborn as she is, and something had to give. :p She's resting. I have my time and her and my daughter actually keep eachother company during the second half of naps, so my daughter doesn't need me as much!

Excellent work, gcj!

Baby steps gcj. Stand your ground and bit by bit she will see that mean exactly what you say and that's it! I'm exactly like you.....more stubborn than the children and they eventually learn that. As a busy parent we cave sometimes when we should be consistent. As a home daycare provider we have 5 children following a routine and we HAVE to always follow through.