New child always crying

I have a new one year old who is having some serious separation problems from his parents. Cries when they leave, cries throughout the day--not constantly, but a few times each hour. He will play, and there are smiles and laughs, but the majority of the time he is not happy! When his mom comes he just buries his head in her chest and cries.

Aside from the fact that he's unhappy, it's causing some other issues. When he cries, the other little ones pick up on it and they start crying too. And then I have to calm all of them down! Also, he is a horrible sleeper. Mom says he's like that at home as well. I will put him down and he will cry and cry to the point where he's waking up the other kids because he's screaming. I have tried everything and I cannot get him to go to sleep. And then he's exhausted and even more unhappy.

What do I do? It's been a couple of weeks and he's becoming a bit more comfortable, but barely. And the napping is not improving at all. I haven't had a child who was so miserable before! I feel awful for him, but I don't know how else to help him adjust. Do I just give it more time? The crying is so disruptive to the other kids, and my sanity is going out the window.

Poor you & poor little guy. I would give it some time personally; it does get better. Perhaps adjust his naptime for now to opposite the rest? I'm thinking that a) it will give you & the kids a break from the crying (at least crying in the immediate area) and b) perhaps one on one time while the rest are down will allow him to bond with you? The room full of kids/toys/noise can be an awful lot of stimulii for some I would imagine. Re: Naptime; just keep being firm. This child has to nap. Is he still on 2 naps? I have a one year old that must go down for first nap by 8am (she arrives @ 7:30). If I don't put her own that early she is a bear all day & fights her naps. Good luck in whatever you decide:)

I'd stick with it for a another week or two. It's a scary thing to be brought to a house you don't know with a person who's not mom... especially when all they've known since birth is mom!

This job can be hard sometimes... really hard! Just keep staying close, reasurring him he's safe and be consistent. I had one of my 1 year olds cry for a month straight! Walking/crawling to the front door and just cry... like someone was cutting off her toe. It was a horrible cry. She would cry herself to sleep at nap time. I had to put her down first so she didn't wake the other kids, then put the other kids down once she was quiet.

Now, she's fine. She walks right in and waves to mom. She's a 3 hour sleeper... not a peep out of her. It was worth the time I put into her. And it took me a full, solid month of full time care to get to that point.

I agree ~ starting childcare is stressful for babies .... try to remember back to your first day of school or first day on a new job all those feelings of anxiety you had now imagine that you had no WORDS to ask for help, to express your feelings to a peer or coworker :(

Things to do to help ~ play lots of object permanence orientated games with them to help them master that what 'goes away comes back' so peek a boo games with items, with you. Hiding things under blankets and bringing them back out, leaving the line of site and popping back with the smile and the 'here I am'.

Having something that 'smells' like home for them to hold .... sounds gross but one of moms UNWASHED t shirts that she slept in for example .... kids are sensory orientated and being able to 'smell' mom despite her absence can increase their level of trust and ease anxiety being able to hold that and sleep with that might help to increase babes security.

Naptime will come too ~ to help the others I play solitudes music through the sleep areas to drown out any noise others might make and black out curtains in the sleep rooms to help them not be distracted by shadows or what not in the room. I had a new little one start in February who only slept 20 minute cat naps at home and within a couple of weeks was having 1 hour in the morning and 2-3 hours in the afternoon ... he just needed help to learn to self sooth back to sleep cause he would wake mid sleep cycle and cry out and mama thought that meant he was 'done' when in reality it was GAS waking him up briefly if you soothed him he would go back to sleep.

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Originally Posted by Inspired by Reggio

I had a new little one start in February who only slept 20 minute cat naps at home and within a couple of weeks was having 1 hour in the morning and 2-3 hours in the afternoon ... he just needed help to learn to self sooth back to sleep cause he would wake mid sleep cycle and cry out and mama thought that meant he was 'done' when in reality it was GAS waking him up briefly if you soothed him he would go back to sleep.

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Same here! I have a little one that will wake up after an hour, some days 20 min crying. Mom gets him up and boy is he cranky when he doesn't have enough sleep. I made the same mistake when he started. But now I help him soothe back to sleep and he goes for another 2 hours. Some days he sleeps for 3 hours straight with no sounds at all!

Mom's tshirt is a great idea. I always asked for a sheet from their bedding that the child has been sleeping on for nap time. Or a special stuffed animal they can leave here.

Stick with it. I find that sometimes the hardest children to transition in turn out to be the best children down the road.