Help with transitioning!

Good Day Ladies!!!

I need advise/tips on how to handle this new child..My mornings r an absolute chaos. She 2 1/2 years, this is her second week in my care, full time 7-4:30. Never been in daycare neither outside of her home where her mom and gradma care for her since born.
As soon as I open the door she starts crying and screeming from the top of her lungs to the point she gets sick and have to vomit. The mom doesnt know what to do and say to the little one to stay calm and understand she has to stay until mommy comes back for her. The best part of all is that after few minutes in here she realized the show is over and the day must go on..:ohmy:
I've been in daycare bussiness for quite sometime and never had to deal with this type of situations where I am clueless as to what is the right thing to do. I know still early in the game but any suggestions would be greatly appreciated!!

Lots of love:)

I've had to do this many times....and it's always unpleasant with a child who's never been with anyone but Mom and Grandma. Just hang in there. It'll get better eventually. For some reason, it just magically ends :)

In the meantime, just be there for her, cuddle her if she wants it but never force yourself on her. One thing I often do is find out what some of her favourite activities are, then do that activity beside her. It's worked for a couple kids...they saw what I was doing and slowly started to join me over time. Another tactic I try after my efforts at home are unsuccessful (this is not for the faint of heart) -- take the kids out somewhere different, unfamiliar. Perhaps tea at a friend's house, a trip to the mall, a place centre....whatever. In this new setting, YOU become what's familiar to the transitioning child. I've had significant success with this, but only use it after a few weeks of toughing it out at home. It doesn't always work, but often does when the child begins to see you as the source of familiarity and comfort. And play it out totally....scoop her up, give her hugs and kisses, etc. Let her sit with you the whole time if necessary. It will only get better from there because now she sees that you're okay :)

Good Luck! Oh.....have a bottle of wine ready for the end of the day....that helps too.

Just make sure that the drop off is as short as can be. The longer mom lingers, the longer the crisis must go on. She will react the same whether mom's at the door for 1 minute or 5 minutes trying to calm her down. Explain this to mom and politely push her out the door. As hard as it is for mom, it only makes it worse for the child.
And as in all phases...this, too shall pass.
That and the wine! Definitely wine in the evening! ;)

Lol..thanks ladies!! you are awesome:yes:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by gcj

Just make sure that the drop off is as short as can be. The longer mom lingers, the longer the crisis must go on. She will react the same whether mom's at the door for 1 minute or 5 minutes trying to calm her down. Explain this to mom and politely push her out the door. As hard as it is for mom, it only makes it worse for the child.
And as in all phases...this, too shall pass.
That and the wine! Definitely wine in the evening! ;)

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EXACTLY! I agree with all of this!

I agree with the other ladies ~ talk with mom about a consistent routine for drop off that is short and sweet ~ like a band aid it is better to just rip it off and let the healing begin verses sitting there pulling it off a tiny inch by inch ;)

Somethings I have seen work with easing this transition and increasing the comfort level of the child are ....

• Create an 'all about daycare picture book' that mom and grandma can read to her at home each night ... take some pictures of all the different routines of the program and what she will be doing each day ... making this connection between home and program with them when she is calm and happy at home can have a huge impact on making her 'trust' the environment as well as open up conversations about what she might be afraid of or what she might look forward to doing in program.
• Take lots of photos of her and send them to MOM because children often feed off of the parents anxiety and if she can see her wee one having fun in your program she will be more at ease herself and the child will sense that.
• Get mom to send in some family photos of them to your program ~ again having a little piece of home with her as a transition item to help her feel comfortable and that she is supported to still have her family with her in the program (as long as it does not make her crying worse cause this does not work for all children).
• Reinforce positive behaviour that others have at drop off ~ aka when other chidren come in happy and say goodbye with respect and dignity praise them so that she can see what is expected behaviour at this time of day.

Sending you quick transition vibes that her discomfort is short lived.