Forcing my child to sleep?

My daycare lady says that all daycare children must be "respectful of quiet time" she never forces them to sleep, but they must lay down with the blanket and stuffy... for 2 hours....

My son usually falls asleep like 10 min. into the book he reads (he is 2.5 and she gives him a picture book in his bed) I want the nap phased out, and she says no..he doesn't wake until 4 o'clock..(She starts turning on lights and stuff at 3:15, but won't make him wake up.....)

She says even her 4 year old follows the same thing, and she claims he goes to bed early like 8pm... Really? I can't get him into bed before 11 if he naps....

Well, we aren't forcing children to sleep because if they fall asleep then their bodies need sleep. If they can sleep through lots of noise as the other children wake up and the curtains are drawn to let in the light then they need the sleep. I don't shake children awake, I let them wake naturally. I have a 6 year old grandson who has been joining us on his PD days and he lays on his cot in the other room reading books and playing with puzzles, etc. but if he falls asleep for part of quiet/nap time then he needed a little rest. That's my policy.

However, that being said, my naptime for the children starts at 12:30ish and if they are still asleep after 2 1/2 hours (which is right now) I start turning on the lights in the adjoining room and preparing the snack and that's enough to wake the first few children. Then the rest wake naturally, but by 3-3:15. I wouldn't want them to sleep any later than that or it may affect their evening sleep. But they NEED the afternoon nap.

I do naps for all my little ones.. We start getting ready at 12:30 for nap.. They're usually sleeping by 1pm-1:15.. Nap time is over at 3:30. But all of my kids usually wake up between 2:30-3. When they have woken up I just pop in a video until nap time is over. Maybe she could put your little one down last.

I stop naps the summer before they go to school. NOw that they have full day kindergarten, it's not in the childs best interest ( in my opinion ) to still be in that habit.

Just like we expect parents to prepare their child at 12 months for our routine, I try to prepare children for the schools routine. It makes the transition easier.

I still require "quiet time" The big kids are away from the sleeping area and have an assortment of things to play with until quiet time is over. Some days I take them outside, but it's still quiet activities.

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Originally Posted by 1kidmama

My daycare lady says that all daycare children must be "respectful of quiet time" she never forces them to sleep, but they must lay down with the blanket and stuffy... for 2 hours....

My son usually falls asleep like 10 min. into the book he reads (he is 2.5 and she gives him a picture book in his bed) I want the nap phased out, and she says no..he doesn't wake until 4 o'clock..(She starts turning on lights and stuff at 3:15, but won't make him wake up.....)

She says even her 4 year old follows the same thing, and she claims he goes to bed early like 8pm... Really? I can't get him into bed before 11 if he naps....

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Sounds to me like you need to find new daycare.

If the policies and rules your current provider has isn't working for you, why would you expect her to change what works for her in her home for her business just because it isn't working for you??

If she requires nap time and you don't want your child napping then the solution is super simple......

.....find a provider who doesn't have a required quiet/rest/nap time.

I guess, but if not resting its movie/book time with the lights out for most in my area...daycare center's here have staff in the room to make sure they sleep...

I think you will find that most daycares require at minimum a quiet time. It is actually recommended and backed by research that young children need a rest period in the afternoon. And in kindgarten they actually still have a naptime (it is 30-40 minutes)...so I do not take nap away for children starting school soon. If they are sleeping it is because they are tired and need the sleep...nobody can actually force a child who is not tired to sleep...you can force them to stay quiet, but not sleep. My 5 year old often naps still when he is home and he sleeps well at night. He goes to bed a bit later in the summer because we are out enjoying physical activities such as biking and playing at the park etc...so he then has a nice rest in the afternoon. He still goes to bed by 9 at the latest. When he goes to school and has only 30 minutes of rest and doesn't actually sleep...he is so tired he is a wreck when he gets home and he has to go to bed by 7pm. I like our family time in the evening, so I prefer he naps and goes to bed a bit later. 11pm is too late for sure...but be sure it isn't because your son is going through a phase of sleep resistance. I had a daycare boy who did this recently (actually most kids do it at various stages)...finally his parents took my advice and let him cry it out in his room for a few nights until he got back to going to sleep. He always naps 2 to 2.5 hours for me...nothing changed in his naps, but he is back to sleeping at a decent hour at night. Sometimes it isn't lack of tiredness, but testing of boundaries (my kids have all done this to me as well and if I stay strong and firm, it passes).

All the children in my daycare sleep from 12:30 - 3 and yes all children must be respectful of quiet time .... However I have fans running throughout the quiet area so that if someone is challenging that rule they are not disturbing the others

Everyone needs some downtime in their day. It is required by law in Ontario daycare centres and in full day JK they still have a quiet time and some sleep in the afternoons.

If your child is falling asleep that fast how do you expect your child to cope for the rest of the afternoon? At the same time I do disagree with the notion of not waking the child. Maybe they do need it but it should wait till bedtime. There should be a cut off time for napping or it becomes a vicious circle of not sleeping at night because they are not tired and then being overtired the next day and not able to cope to play.

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Originally Posted by 1kidmama

I guess, but if not resting its movie/book time with the lights out for most in my area...daycare center's here have staff in the room to make sure they sleep...

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This is going to sound argumentative but it's not intended to.

If most daycares in your area (and it's not just in YOUR area ;) I know a lot of providers!) require that children rest for a period of time why do you think that is? I mean, these are the people in the business of caring for kids. They know kids. They spend 50 hours a week with kids.

The answer to my own question (bolded) is that providers require a rest period because kids NEED that rest time. Most kids are chronically over tired. Most behavioural problems are due to over- tiredness. We wouldn't feed our kids junk food so why do we think it's okay to give them junk sleep?

A child that is 2.5 years old needs between 12 and 14 hours of sleep per day to allow for optimal health, growth and development. If he is going to bed at 11pm and, presumably getting up at least by 7am (because he needs to get up to be at daycare) then that leaves a 4 hour gap of time he was robbed of sleep. He NEEDS the nap.

My guess is that your child is actually OVER-tired when you put him to bed and that is the reason he won't go down. When a parent tells me their child won't go to bed at night due to a nap I know that one of two things (or both) are happening. Either the child is over-tired because the parents put the child to bed too late, or, the parent is not parenting at bed time. It is important that the child understand that bedtime is bedtime and Tom-foolery will NOT be tolerated no matter how much fussing, crying or getting back out of bed occurs.

Your son's night time sleep problems are NOT the result of having had a nap.