So. Very. Picky. Ugh. Vent.

I have a 5.5 year old in my care. Has been for over 2 years. This kid has always been picky and I always gave given all the kids healthy, well balanced meals and snacks. My thought have always been, I will offer the healthy food and they can choose to eat it or go hungry. I also don't give seconds of one item unless they eat ALL their meal. For instance lunch today was veggie soup(lots potatoes, carrots, corn), veggies with dip, cheese slices and bannock with butter, peanut butter or jam. This kid only wants the bannock. Then wants more but wont touch the other food. Today mom picks up early and kid complains that theywasn't allowed to eat enough lunch. Mom knows my rules and agreed to them. But apparently lately mom makes this kid whatever they want if they don't want the family supper. She asks me if it would be okay next time just giving him unlimited amounts of what he likes at meals.

This kid now eats NO fruits or veggies. And only breads, buns, some crackers and cereal. Cheese or milk if he feels like it. I asked mom and dad if they feel it would be beneficial to be more forceful on the issue if at least TRYING each food at each meal and if the kid truly hates it then they don't have to eat it. They said they don't want to force the issue because what if he stops eating completely?

This kid is so scrawny and always catching colds etc. I feel bad for the kid but the parents have created and allowed this. It's so frustrating because he goes hungry a lot. And it's difficult finding things he will eat.

Why would a parent allow this? What a huge disservice to their child.

At this age the child knows how to play the game too.

I have the same rules as in what is put on the plate has to be eaten before I will put any more of anything on the plate. Normally I don't cook seconds anyways. But for those that are hungry they may have additional food items.

I have an almost 2 year old right now that is doing the only eats carb thing and yes scrawny and behind to the point of failure to thrive and we are supposed to be monitoring her closely. Parent have interpreted that to mean get whatever into her. It has backfired of course to the point she eats nothing but carbs so not getting the right nutrients. Parents just give her more of what she does eat even if she never touches anything else on her plate - one can live on noodles according to them. Hoping the doctor has more sage advice for them when she goes later this month for her next followup. I have suggested asking for a referral to a nutritionist.

Oh, my rule is EXACTLY your rule and I withhold the bread items until the end in my tiniest boy since that's all he eats then he's full. Nope, he needs the protein and veggie/fruits first and sometimes he doesn't get the bread at all, it goes away if he's going too slowly. He's 1 year old and he's going to know my rules are without exception or negotiations before he's 2. At home he always wins. Not here. My rules are for ALL the children. Of course, his parents know and agree with all of this.

What amazes me is that the parents agree to our feeding terms but don't enforce the same rules at home and then no one makes progress.

I know! The rules won't work and good habits won't stick if mom and dad aren't willing to enforce the same rules at home. It's so frustrating because at one point I had this kid eating apples, corn and carrots. Now we are in this situation and it feels like they want me to do all the work but they don't seem to understand that they need to crack down too.

Ah, I'm so glad you ladies picked up on my sarcasm. Yes, I always tell the parents when something is working here and hope that they will try it at home. Oh well, all I can do is enforce my rules 9 hours a day while the children are with me. They all learn that they don't push their luck with me and they are so well behaved. I get compliments every where we go. Then the parents come to the door and I don't even recognize half these kids. Good grief!!!!!!!

It works!

I have a child like this too. I have tried everything (child is 2.5yrs old) I sent away from table, I put a small portion, made the foods they like, made the foods mom said child like. I tried it all. AND I HAD ENOUGH OF IT! I know people say to pick and choose battles, but when I cook it, I expect you to eat it. And guess what, child now has to sit and eat, it takes an hour but child will eat.
Last week, child ate no breaky for me, wanted crackers, didn't give any, didn't like snack either. So had to wait for lunch. Sat for an hour but ate the lunch. But went home and didn't like the dinner, so child went to bed without eating nothing all day except for lunch. Guess what, next day became ill with fever and was tired.
I've tried to get parents on board but its easier to send to bed then to deal with it.