Do you feel under the microscope some days?

Hi ladies!
I have 3 children of my own plus 5 daycare children (4 full time, 1 before and after school girl). So somedays, especially when walking home from the bus stop I am walking with up to 8 children. My kiddies know the drill and I have 2 in the double stroller and the rest holding on to the stroller except for the oldest 2. They are SO well behaved walking, although I'm sure it's a sight to see!
In the last week or so, this older couple who takes frequent walks on my street have been downright staring at us when we walk passed. Not a "hello neighbor, look at those cute kids" kind of stare. Just a blank stare...no smiles. I always kill them with kindness and say hello to which they smile slightly and nod back. I feel like they are looking at my 8 kids and going by whatever news article they've read lately and are making assumptions that I am over ratio. And yesterday as we were coming back from the bus stop, and we always go right to the back yard when we return, he (neighbor man) stopped in his tracks on the sidewalk in front of my house as I was getting the kids to the back yard. I have 2 babies (a 7 month old and a just started walking 15 month old)...after the 3 yrs olds run to the back to wait at the gate, I get the 15 month old started walking then carry the 7m old to the back and come back for the 15 m old whom I can see the entire time. I feel like he was stopping and waiting for me to come get her like I had forgotten her or that he needed to stay and watch her because I wasn't, lol. I feel like they're waiting to pounce!!! I wish they would just come talk to me!

I think in light of all the negative publicity, us providers are very sensitive to this kind of attention/stares and also common folk may feel it is their duty to keep watch for over ratio home daycares. Extra eyes looking out for kids is o.k. with me. I would just continue being friendly with the neighbors who watch you and continue engaging them in quick small talk. They could just be in awe of you and how well you handle all the kids.

Lol! Sometimes I feel the same way. Just this last Friday I was heading with the kids to go pick up my after school girl and one of my 3yob had the biggest temper tantrum because one of the other boys touched his wrist strap thing. He went ballistic! So as I'm pushing a double stroller with one hand, have one 3yob attached to me with a wrist strap in the same hand and this other 3yob under my other arm screaming to high heaven. I'm thinking to myself 'What on earth do my neighbours think?' I just smile and keep on walking :P Sometimes you kinda feel like you are being watched by everyone. Not sure why because we really have nothing to hide but it's easy to feel like you are under a microscope in this profession.

The next time I saw them like that on the sidewalk I would ask them some questions and make some comments. But as you all know, I have a big mouth. :laugh: Why don't you ask them if they like children and would like to meet your 5 daycare children and your 3 children? Follow that up with a statement that you are running a LEGAL home daycare with the right amount of children in care. Grrrrrrrr, get 'em Lou!

Was thinking along the lines of mamaof4. It almost sounds like they want to get involved somehow. Maybe their own grandchildren live far away or they don't have any and wish they did and would love to come and hang out with you and the kids - grandma's make great reading and baking partners.

I like the idea of introducing the children to them in some way. Start by only introducing your own children as people who also live in the neighbourhood. Then mention that the other 5 children are only with you during the day while their parents are at work and somehow work into the conversation what the legal limits are for daycare, etc.

I completely understand how you feel. I don't leave my backyard with the kids and I keep everyone in the house at bus time and just waive to the driver. (stop is at the end of my driveway)

I think it's horrible that there's been so much media surrounding what we do and it's in such a negative light. I'm hoping it all just blows over.

As for your 2 nosey neighbours... I'm sure they talk about you all the time. But really, they have nothing to talk about. If I were you I'd get the kids to waive at them too. Make sure they know you see them just as much as they see you. If they stop and watch you, I'd probably say something like "did I drop something? " I hate nosey people.

I have had neighbour's count my kids before, saying oh 6 kids. Or at the park they will say how many does she have today. Sooooooooooo rude.

My favourite is when they talk about me like I'm not even there, "oh her, she has a daycare", whisper, whisper, whisper.

One time had to say hello to a Mom 3 times very boldly before she acknowledged my presence. I live in a nice area and usually frequent the park with nannies and a handful of friendly Mom's.

It's when I go to the park after school that I get the working "Mom's " who consider what I do below there standards.