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Feeling a tad stretched lately !! Trying to manage my life and my moms health has taken a bad turn. Have been rushing up to icu a week straight right after work . Staying until I feel she's as comfortable as can be and coming home to get ready for the next day ! Thankfully today is my Friday so I have a break until Monday from the dayhome but I'm sitting trying not to think of what's happening at the hospital , a dcg woke up after an hour nap and is screaming ! I have 4 other nappers !
I feel your pain Secondtimearound. Please don't forget to take care of yourself as well. It's very easy to get lost in taking care of everyone else's needs and forget about your own. Do you have any other support from other family members who could check on your mom?
Thank you ! Yes , it's on a schedule so everyone takes a time spot from 7am until I leave . I haven't cooked a meal , ( supper ) I am feeling guilty leaving my 5 yr old !! Shopping at walmart at 10 pm and can't even remember why I'm there !
I have to organize myself but around 5 pm I get so anxious I find myself running out the door !! I'm usually calm in control person !
None of my dcp really know anything , I don't know why I can't bring myself to inform them . I don't want to explain anything to them , weird ??
I'm so sorry you are going through this. Is your mom going to be ok? I hope you have support at home, someone to talk to that can help. Stay strong.
I'm not sure .
I hope your mom will be alright. You need to slow down and do not feel guilty about not getting things done or paying enough attention to things and people. This is a really difficult time for you and I get that you don't want to mention it to the parents. I am private with my personal difficulties as well and I also don't want to answer the same questions 5 times over from well meaning parents.
Sending you some virtual hugs and I hope she gets well:glomp:
I am so sorry to hear about your difficult time right now. I do hope that your mother gets better and that you and your family are able to not only be their for her sufficiently, but be there for each other too. Maybe if possible see if you can take it turns to make a family meal once a week for all of you. It may give you all the opportunity to relax even if it's just a little, while taking some pressure off just one of you to put a decent meal on the table by making it a collaborative effort while fortifying those family bonds and relationships which I believe is very important during times like these. It would be a great opportunity for your 5 year old to be surrounded by familiar family members and take some pressure and guilt off you.
I have to say that I think you are more than likely doing a better job at juggling than you know. Dealing with multiple BIG things pulling you in different directions can be messy, but it doesn't mean you aren't doing it well. As long as it gets done in some fashion, don't beat yourself up if you are all over the place getting to your destination. Make the time you have with your child count, use that relationship to sooth you. Children are miraculous creatures and I believe they can care as much for us as we can for them in ways we take for granted when rushing through our busy, often chaotic lives.
We are here for you so vent to us, offload, complain, reach out for love and support. Wishing you and your family hope, strength and positive vibes.....:glomp::fl ower:
So sorry to hear about your mom!! I hope that she gets better :)
I agree with everything the others said. Take care of yourself, don't feel guilty for letting things slide and ask for help if you need it!! It sounds like you are doing the best you can and that is all anyone can ask of you.
I don't like to tell my dcparents things like this either but there was once that my grandpa was in the hospital and we weren't sure what the outcome was going to be. I didn't go into detail but I made all the parents aware that they might get a call from me to pick up their child so I could get to the hospital if need be. They all understood and made arrangements just in case. He ended up being okay and I let my dcparents know so that they weren't on "standby" anymore.
Thank you all !! Thank you for the support !! I'm trying not to be OCD about everything and just get through it . I tend to make myself stress over small details . Good idea with the family dinner ! I agree my dd would love that !!
I think I felt if I told dcp something serious was happening in my life , they would be thinking I wasn't on top of things in my dayhome .
Big hugs. Don't feel guilty about the little things, like cooking a meal. If you need to eat take out until things settle then so be it.
As for telling the dc parents, it depends. I chose to inform my dc clients whilst my father was in palliative care. I needed to cut my hours back a little and had an assistant come in a few days a week so I can spend more time with him. So they needed to know. Most people are very understanding and very supportive and will try to accomodate you if you need to close early, etc.
It helps tremendously to have a good support team (husband, best friend, close relative, etc) sounds like you do. stay strong.