New little guy, some feedback

Hey,

So my new little one started 3 wks a go and I just want some feedback as to how it's going. I have only ever had super smooth transitions prior to this, so I don't have a ton of experience with the rough transitions.

He cried a lot in the beginning, went on a hunger strike and napping of course sucked. He now is happy when he arrives but doesn't eat morning snack. He plays happily by himself inside but outside screams for me. I leave him, check in with him and hold him sometimes. He isn't walking so I have been giving him a little dishpan of water as his own personal water table on the ground which he likes. But he is mostly unhappy outside. Loves the stroller but we haven't gone for a ton of walks as my group of little ones that can't walk far now exceeds my triple stroller and we can't get too far before they poop out on me. Naps are good now except he sometimes wakes up the last half hour and screams until it's over. He gets picked up shortly after waking up so the afternoon is awesome.

Part of the problem is because he chooses not to eat a.m snack he gets starving before lunch. I would like him to learn that he has to wait but I am wondering if this is possible for a 12 mos old. My other kids have gotten it but he doesn't seem to get this. I wondered about bringing a snack outside for him but wonder what message this gives the other kids (especially because they will all want it to) and also would this just delay getting him on the schedule.

Questions:
How can I encourage more Independence outside and discourage the screaming?

Should I feed him a snack outside to tide him over and just tell the other kids he gets it because he is so young?

Can you push back snack for everyone? What about bringing snack outside? Now that it's summer, I usually push snack back by half an hour and we usually eat it outside.

Outside, I would just let him scream. I'd sit with him for a bit and play or I would encourage one of the other kids to sit and play with him. If he isn't walking or crawling yet I would place him where the other kids are and move him as needed. He will eventually start moving himself to where the action is. I usually just sit in my chair and supervise the group as a whole so I would place him on the blanket I keep for outside near me as well.

I don't think there is much you can do about screaming outside other than offering activities or toys and generally trying to convince him that it's fun to be outside...aside from that I think you are just going to have to wait for him to adjust.

As for skipping am snack I have one who STILL does this but mom has admitted to filling him up with baby cereal for breakfast which explains why he is never hungry. I would try and either push am snack back even just 15 mins. However I usually naturally move lunch 15-30 mins instead when I have a little one because I try and get them to bed 1/2 hour earlier since I find that they usually need the extra sleep anyways (I don't really do morning naps).

Good luck...I am going to be starting two new ones this summer and I am keeping my fingers crossed for easy transitions as I have one who took a very long time to adjust and it was painful...I really don't want to go through that again!

My youngest dck hated being outside until just recently. I honestly did just what 5lm suggested. If he's genuinely upset, I'd of course give him a hug and comfort him, but other than that, let him be. Give him praise for good behavior and (when he's not crying) offer him toys or play little paddy cake games with or whatever.

My dck loves being outside now, and is totally find with me walking away or being in a different area of the yard (and ours is quite big).

I find they take a bit longer to adapt to being outside. It is overwhelming with the new environment, sounds and all that. All you can do is wait him out while trying to keep him involved in the activities. I find it also takes them longer to realize they can be mobile in the grass...so if he is not yet fully mobile inside it takes longer and may be upsetting him even more.

As for the am snack. Can you ask the family to feed him earlier (or later)? See if that will help him either accept snack or last through until lunch time?

The joys of coloured cups is that no one knows what is in them so the older ones can have water and the baby can have milk. I would offer it to him mid morning outside. Are you giving the baby a chance to have a morning nap if he was used to doing that at home which I know probably coincides with being outside. Realize that outside is totally knew to him as he won't remember grass from last summer if he even actually got down onto it or was in a sitter, on a mat etc. A blanket and some of his usual house toys that are easily washed will help him make the connection that it is the same place. He may even take to a playpen outside as his preferred place.

Thanks everyone. So I spoke to his dad and asked them to feed him a lighter breakfast as they are giving him a huge breakfast and a bottle of milk, no wonder he's not hungry! I used to bring milk out for my other 12 mos olds when they were little. I guess I hadn't thought of it as he doesn't really drink much milk with me. Will see how tomorrow goes and bring some milk outside for him.