Why do I seem to consistantly have an issue with this one child

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06-19-2014 08:06 AM
bright sparks

Why do I seem to consistantly have an issue with this one child

My AP child always has something going on. He is generally a great kid so it's not like I want to tear my eyes out with frustration or anything, it's just I've never had a child in my care have separation issues like this.

I kid you not this child can not go into the playroom in the morning without a full on meltdown. He is perfectly fine if he goes in a highchair and can see me pottering around but it's as though the transition from centre of attention with his parents in the morning to playing independently while other kids come and I am busy chasing my kids tails out the door for school, is so hard for him. I am glad there are no flies on the wall reporting back to parents because I just leave him to cry it out now. If I so much as give him my attention, hold him or put him in a chair he stops immediately. I think it's easy top say he is trying to manipulate me but I don't think he is. I think he is genuinely upset and misses his mum. I give him absolutely zero attention. It doesn't last very long in general but there are definitely times, especially after the weekends which for me are 3 days, when he is so much worse...that's why I know its an attachment thing. He has been with me 6 months now and he really is a sweet kid but I'd love to bash his parents heads together and say pay attention to whats going on with your child and ask yourselves why!!!
06-19-2014 10:09 AM
Lee-Bee

:-(

Any chance the parents would be open to switching their hours so they are last to arrive? This may make it easier on him.

I have an AP kiddo here (well I have 2 but it's only an issue with the one) and I find it hardest at the drop offs and pick ups as well. Though he is calm and fine...but you can see it is hard.

The parenting style drives me bonkers at times because it just doesn't make life easy on the kids but at the same time I could care less because during daycare hours the kids know the rules and expectations and thrive in routine and consistency where they don't get to call the shots. But it's those moments at pick up and drop-off where control switches back to the child that I want to gouge my eye balls out.
06-19-2014 10:25 AM
bright sparks

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lee-Bee

:-(

Any chance the parents would be open to switching their hours so they are last to arrive? This may make it easier on him.

I have an AP kiddo here (well I have 2 but it's only an issue with the one) and I find it hardest at the drop offs and pick ups as well. Though he is calm and fine...but you can see it is hard.

The parenting style drives me bonkers at times because it just doesn't make life easy on the kids but at the same time I could care less because during daycare hours the kids know the rules and expectations and thrive in routine and consistency where they don't get to call the shots. But it's those moments at pick up and drop-off where control switches back to the child that I want to gouge my eye balls out.

I begrudge adjusting things because of their undoing.....I am hoping that he will get over it to be honest if I just stick to my guns. Pick up is not an issue and today he only cried for about 5 or 10 minutes. If he is tired though, its more like 30 minutes and I just put him to bed. When they co-sleep with him by way of soothing him rather than letting him work it out himself and self sooth, his day here is horrific. It drives me bonkers too lol Thank goodness the rest of the time he is okay. He screams for all of 2 minutes when I put him down for nap but I spoke to mum about this and she breasts feeds to sooth him so that explains that. What are these people thinking. He is 17 months old and needs to be allowed to learn to self sooth. He is also having some issues with eating now and mum tells me that if she is busy she gives him jarred food...thanks for that. Laziness is her parenting method not attachment parenting. I think AP can work for people regardless of my own parenting style but it narks me off how many people say they follow AP but really they are just using it as a free pass to be lazy!