Parent Being Dishonest

I am pretty sure I know what you guys are going to say about this...

So the SAME mother that I was whining about before (and didn't terminate) is pregnant, and already in her second trimester. This means maternity leave in the spring, which means I will be down a kid. Problem is, she hasn't told me. A mutual friend let it slip. Also, she doesn't intend on telling me any time soon. Why? Because she is up for a new job, and will know whether she got the position in the next week or two. Now, if she gets the new position, it would mean that she will need an extra day of care, as she is currently only Monday to Thursday. If she needs an extra day of care, I would have to terminate one of my part-timers in order to accomodate her new schedule, and she KNOWS THIS. How unfair is that?

So my question is, do I call her on it? Do I wait until she asks about the extra day of care, and if I wait, do I tell her that I know she is pregnant and that she is trying to take me for a ride?

I am annoyed. I don't want to get the friend in hot water though, as the very day the friend told me, my dck's mom called her up and was very adament that she not tell me that she is pregnant! This is really drama that I do not want or need.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Alphaghetti

I am pretty sure I know what you guys are going to say about this...

So the SAME mother that I was whining about before (and didn't terminate) is pregnant, and already in her second trimester. This means maternity leave in the spring, which means I will be down a kid. Problem is, she hasn't told me. A mutual friend let it slip. Also, she doesn't intend on telling me any time soon. Why? Because she is up for a new job, and will know whether she got the position in the next week or two. Now, if she gets the new position, it would mean that she will need an extra day of care, as she is currently only Monday to Thursday. If she needs an extra day of care, I would have to terminate one of my part-timers in order to accomodate her new schedule, and she KNOWS THIS. How unfair is that?

So my question is, do I call her on it? Do I wait until she asks about the extra day of care, and if I wait, do I tell her that I know she is pregnant and that she is trying to take me for a ride?

I am annoyed. I don't want to get the friend in hot water though, as the very day the friend told me, my dck's mom called her up and was very adament that she not tell me that she is pregnant! This is really drama that I do not want or need.

---

Don't terminate your part timer as ashe is part time too? If she asks for the space on the extra day then she can't have it. Seems simple to me!

She may not even get the position! I would go with the flow and cross that bridge when it comes.

Is she showing? If so I would just say is there something your not telling me and point to the bump! If shes meaty then you can't!

Sue

P.S How would this be fair to your part timer?

Good point, Sue, regarding her not even having been offered the job yet. I guess I am just SO irritated with this woman that I needed to post here where people understand. I feel like I am being duped, and that's not cool for one mom to do to another.

She's always had a paunch around the middle, and she wears loose clothing, so I can't really pretend to notice a bump.

About it being fair to my part-timer, I never told the mother that I would ditch a part timer. I think she just assumes that I will since she was here first. I will not get rid of one of my part time kids, as I like their parents, the kids are great, and besides they pay me more :laugh:

I think you start to advertise an opening in your daycare. The mom isn't telling you about the pregnancy because she knows it would influence your decision regarding the extra day of care. She is hoping she can get you to give it to her but if you know it is only temporary then you likely won't. How do you know that she hasn't already lined up alternate care for the full week just in case you won't accomodate her. This would be the ideal time to sever ties based on sorry you don't have an opening. Advertise to fill even if it is a 3 day week child as two part times pay the same if not more than one full time. My guess is she hasn't told work either and that is why she wants it hush hush as she knows she would never be considered for the job if she was pregnant.

I love hearing the drama! Bahaha! Not at your expense though, this is a ridiculous situation. She's being completely disrespectful. She's obviously hiding the pregnancy from her employer also, shows her character. Grr. Post ads, get a new family in there and for all the zillion other reasons we all think she needs to go, terminate her. Good luck!

Ugh. I offer my sympathies. She seems like kind of a cow, in general.
But I am not sure I would say anything at this point. She doesn't really have an obligation to tell you anything, and as long as she is sticking to her end of the bargain (in regards to paying fees, giving proper notice, etc), you don't have any issues other than her questionable character!!
If she does ask about that 5th day, I would tell her "Sorry, I have that space filled". Too bad that she was here first; the agreement was for 4 days a week, not 5. Be prepared to fill that spot if she does take off, because I bet she will....

I think by law, she doesn't have to inform anyone about her pregnancy, included her boss up until she is 3 months pregnant.

And I would have to aggree with Skysue. If she asks and you are available then no problem, but if you are not available then it's her problem. I'm sure you can find a replacement for her child.

Good luck,
Cocoon

Cocoon, you're right, she has no legal obligation to tell me. That's hardly the point. My point was, she was going to get me to shuffle my dck's around, and then go on mat leave 3 months after I had done this for her. As it stands, I don't have to worry as she did not get the job.