I want my cheque back

I was sick one day last week and I do not get paid sick days. All my parents gave me cheques for the full amount and did not deduct the sick day. I contacted all my parents and let them know the mistake and asked if they could bring a new cheque today, no problem.

My one new DC parent (been with me now 3 wks) gave the new cheque and asked for the old one. I said sure, I left it upstairs but I could give it back at the end of the day or just rip it up. She looked all nervous (I guess that I now had 2 cheques). She emails me later and asks for the old cheque to be returned at the end of the day as she would feel more comfortable with this. No problem I say. I know trust needs to be developed but it kind of made me pause for a moment. 1) I told them about the error instead of just pocketing the money and pleading innocence if I was "discovered." 2) You leave your child with me everyday and therefore trust me with your child but not with your money?? Just a vent...I'm done.

Maybe they have a really tight budget and are concerned you might mistakenly deposit both?

That's all I can come up with...I'd rather leave an extra cheque with someone I don't trust than my child lol.

She most likely trusts you with her child but she may have had a bad financial experience in the past and is now cautious.

Honestly, I'd want the cheque back too if it were me. I think the safest way to avoid financial issues is to have complete control over your money. I would have had all their cheques ready for exchange to avoid any issues.

I'm sure it will all be fine :) We sometimes mistake people's ways to keep themselves safe as mistrust towards us specifically when it's just not the case. ( I mean this in all aspects of life not necessarily just daycare)

I too like full and total control over my finances and it's not necessarily about not trusting you. It's about the fact that there are two cheques now made out to you for the same period.

The parent isn't to know that your spouse won't scoop up the cheque to deposit, or any number of potential but unlikely situations which all negatively affect the parent's situation. Personally, I wouldn't have given you the new cheque unless I had the old one in my hand. And of course, if that's an issue where children are present, we can exchange at the end of the day if that's easier. I would rather you bank the old one and I could deduct it next time around than be in a situation where you have two cheques.

As said, it's not about not trusting you. It's about not being placed in a position where we felt potentially financially vulnerable.

Having two cheques potentially means my mortgage doesn't get paid, my insurance doesn't get paid, my other bills don't get paid, if you, in error deposit them both. That doesn't just create a pain-in-the-butt situation with NSF for other bills, it potentially affects my credit rating too. It would have made me very nervous. I wouldn't have done it.

Sorry that the family made you feel bad. Like the other ladies have said, it's probably got nothing to do with trusting you, and everything to do with the family wanting to be sure that two cheques are not deposited by mistake. My parents pay me by post dated cheques at the start of each month. I'm not paid for sick days either and what I do when I have a week where parents have "overpaid" is I credit their next month's dues with the one (or two or three) day(s) that has/have been overpaid. Maybe that would be a better approach next time ?

I have to admit, I'd feel miffed at first as well. But as the others have said, it was most likely nothing personal with trust, but a tight budget, worried it would get lost and deposited at a much later date by someone else, etc.

I'd let it go. What I've done in the past is credited the families a day the following week. So no need to re-write cheques or refund cash.

I have credited in the past but I asked them to rewrite the cheques because they had all given me postdated cheques until the end of the year and I wanted it done and dealt with before the end of the year.

I'm not upset about it. I was just a little surprised at how adamant she was. I never really thought of the situations coming up as posted e.g. accidentally cashing it etc. I just kind of took it like she thought I was going to steal from her. Makes sense now.

I found it easier to just write a cheque from me to them to refund a sick day. Since I had post dated cheques months in advance it was easier to keep using their already written cheques and write my own to them.

I also just adjust the following pay period if I am sick. I have one family that gives post dated cheques and I just adjust their amount at the end of the year. I don't take many sick days so this Christmas I only have to adjust 2.5 days off their final cheque. They don't mind.