Hygiene

I started an 18 month old boy, and hes such a happy boy. Very playful and plays good with the other children, including my own.
But ever since he started, I noticed he had a bad bumm rash when he first started. As the week came close to an end, and while I took care of it - it cleared up. By the time Monday came along, again.. rash is back! like come one... 2 days of not being here he comes back with an even worst rash then before!... that has happened twice.
I mentioned it to Grandma, who picks him up (Father doesnt come that often but lives with him and Mother isnt involved with him. I advised maybe use some corn starch to allow it to dry, which is what I use all the time on my baby and she NEVER gets a rash since I started using it.. she said thats what they use.. WELL WHY DOES IT KEEP COMING BACK? hes just a baby and can not take care of himself.. its been 5 weeks since I had him, and its like that every Monday.
but thats not it... his handsome lil face and hands are always black and dirty.
Before I start the day and as soon as he comes I have to wash him and clean his bumm very well before I start the day...
on the 2nd week, I had requested that he comes by ready to start the day, face hands and bumm cleaned... Grandma said she will tell father about it.. well not yet... he still comes with a bad hygiene ...
I have increased my rate to $50 a month for the extra care.. If I have to clean him every morning and have his rate the same as a 3 year old girl that wipes her own bumm.. Its just not fair...
Do you agree??
I am new to the whole approved day home too.. I just started 6 months ago, and not sure where else to turn to for advice..

I don't know what the situation is at home but it sounds like dad may be overwhelmed. Did mom recently exit the picture? It is concerning that they are not properly taking care of him. Could his rashes be happening at night when he is sleeping in a diaper for long stretches? My first daughter got horrible rashes no matter what we did. This was due to a medical issue as she had reconstructive bowel surgery making her poop constantly (15-20 times a day) and also her poops were more acidic. People would see her bum when I changed her in public and gasp. We tried every medical grade cream and let her air dry but she just had to outgrow it as her bowel matured. That being said, the daycare she was attending was extremely concerned and it wasn't until they spoke to the medical team at Sick Kids that they laid off.

I tell you this because we don't know the whole story about what is going on. It sounds like a case of neglect from perhaps a very overwhelmed parent. The proper course of action would be to again express your concerns and try and problem solve with them. I wold insist the father come to the meeting. If things aren't rectified, let them know you will have to call children's aid.

How often does he poop for you? It could be related to a food intolerance and he may eat differently at home so the rash gets worse...then with different foods at your place and your increased care you see improvements. It could be many foods, my daughter has a milk protein intolerance if she gets even trace amounts of dairy in her diet she immediately gets a really bad rash (open wound bleeding rash) due to non-stop poops (10-15+ a day) that are more acidic. Even with us putting tons of strong cream on as a barrier she gets the rash and most people would cringe if they saw it. There is nothing we can do aside from avoiding dairy and slathering on the cream.

Point being...maybe they are taking care of his rash but it is getting worse due to some sort of difference between home and daycare. Could even be a reaction to different diapers at home, or the cream they use.

The fact his hands and face are dirty in addition to the rash MAY indicate they are putting less effort on hygiene but it doesn't necessarily mean they are being negligent. If the mom is out of the picture, especially if this is recent, then dad could very well be utterly overwhelmed. I would think almost any dad would be struggling with suddenly being the sole caregiver of a toddler and to survive some things just have to move to the bottom of the priority list.

If your attempts to tell them to take better care of the rash are not working then change your approach. If they are overwhelmed with life right now, being told they are sucking at caring for the boy is not the solution. They need to be given caring, helpful tips to ensure they can take care of the little guy. If dad is struggling he needs encouragement to know that 'hey, you can do this'. With the encouragement will come empowerment and everything will hopefully fall into place.

Maybe instead of telling them to take better care of the rash star inquiring if it could be food related. Find the cause of the rash...eliminate the cause so they don't need to be putting extra time and care to fixing the reaction to the cause.

Keep doing what you are doing for the little boy...it makes a world of difference. With our job comes extra work for some children than others. Any child under he age of 2 will need more care with hygiene and diapers than a toilet trained 3 yr old. The fact that he gets along with the children and is a happy little guy makes it easier. He could be needing all this extra rash care AND be a troublesome handful that is making everyone miserable.

Hopefully the rash clears soon and hopefully things at home for this little guy are indeed loving and caring...if only a bit overwhelming for dad right now.

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Originally Posted by torontokids

I don't know what the situation is at home but it sounds like dad may be overwhelmed. Did mom recently exit the picture? It is concerning that they are not properly taking care of him. Could his rashes be happening at night when he is sleeping in a diaper for long stretches? My first daughter got horrible rashes no matter what we did. This was due to a medical issue as she had reconstructive bowel surgery making her poop constantly (15-20 times a day) and also her poops were more acidic. People would see her bum when I changed her in public and gasp. We tried every medical grade cream and let her air dry but she just had to outgrow it as her bowel matured. That being said, the daycare she was attending was extremely concerned and it wasn't until they spoke to the medical team at Sick Kids that they laid off.

I tell you this because we don't know the whole story about what is going on. It sounds like a case of neglect from perhaps a very overwhelmed parent. The proper course of action would be to again express your concerns and try and problem solve with them. I wold insist the father come to the meeting. If things aren't rectified, let them know you will have to call children's aid.

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I am so sorry to hear your baby had that :( must be so heart breaking to cant do any thing :(..
But thats the thing, he has poops while he is here, and it seems normal and by Friday its all cleared up. Monday comes, its back again... I am still trying to get a hold of father.. grandma said she will personally make him call, so I look forward to talking to him..
as for his mother, she was never in the picture as to what I was told.. so it could be just that father doesnt know much about taking the right care of him

Yes really :) I am pleased to have him in my care.. hes such a great lil fella...
I am looking forward to talking with father, hes supposed to call me tonight, Ill have to present some courses available for single dads, and all that good stuff..
I fed him all kinds of veggies, fruits, and milk.
Come to think about it, he was coming with a bottle full of kool aid some days. I was just replacing it with milk... but we shall see what father says tonight, maybe I will get an actual answer from him for what might be causing it

Great ideas about medical issues, overwhelmed parent, and possible food allergies. It could also be a yeast infection. My kid would have boil like marks and redness appear and disappear. Daycare was so concerned. We tried everything. Finally took their advice and saw the Dr. It was a yeast infection. Anyways...food for thought. Poor little guy though. Sounds like a rough start to life.

So I seen the father, and he had no question or concern of me upping the charge. He just wanted to sign and get outta here. He is still coming with bad rashes... no food allergies, or health concerns that they know of... so its just not taking care of him... unfortunately Grandma tries to stay in the picture by guiding him to do the right thing but it just doesn't turn out to be that way. She is even a bit over whelmed but they can do a better job for sure.
I am with an agency too, and even they don't want to push the next button to doing the right thing to get them help... I was trying to get into a contract with another agency to help with this family, but no response yet... so its a bit frustrating. It just takes a few seconds to wash his hands, face and just 2-3 minutes to change his butt... and they wont take that time.. so unfortunate..

This very tricky because personal hygiene is personal issue.

Sure, most people wash, shower, bath every day but not every person does. That not make them bad people just they have less priority with hygiene that what is seems normal. But normal is different to all.

Yes I understand it not nice but do you give discount to extra clean kids? It slippy slope to apply own standards to others.

Maybe you don't wash your bedding as many times as I do mine. Maybe you don't wash your curtain as many times as I do mine. Maybe you don't mop your floor as many times as I do mine. Does that mean I label you as bad hygiene person or does it just mean we are different?

If you charging more for people who fall under your standard, then surely you charge less to people who better than your standard? That would be fair, yes? Those who make extra work pay more those who don't pay less. This is your standard?

I just think some kids smell more. Some are cleaner. Some walk younger. Some speaker quicker. But we charge fee and understand different scopes for different things for different people. I not know any other service that charge extra for silly things. What next? Hair salon charge more to wash long hair because more shampoo. Cafe charge more if people leave food on plate because it needs scraping and washing. Window cleaner charge more for glass with birdie poop on than other panes. It seem like nickle and dimes and rip off client to me.

I think that she is more then able to charge more if this child is taking more time to clean up in he morning. If for what ever reason, the parents aren't able to do their job, why shouldn't we be paid more to do it?
I have in my contract that if a child doesn't come ready for the day, parents are charged a Wake up and get ready fee, of 5 - 20 dollars depending on the extra time and effort that is required of me.
In response to your hair salon comments, yes there are different fees for different levels of time, effort and cost applied to that client. What exactly is your point?
Just the same, we all run our business the way which suits our families and needs, and looking for advice does not warren sarcasm, or nastiness.

Suzie Homemaker, those examples aren't really good ones. Yes, some restaurants charge more if there's food left over on the plate. It's not because they have to scrape the dishes, but because you ordered too much at an "all you can eat" place, and you wasted their food. So by your example, if a restaurant can charge more for wasting, then I should charge more when kids waste my food?
We aren't in the same business as a restaurant, or a window washing company (which I would assume would charge more based on how dirty the window is), so we can't compare our business's to those ones.