Letter from a mother... No safe !!!

I do not feel SAFE !!!

Good day everyone

I registered my baby at a home private daycare as a part timer, from 8am to 12 pm. My baby is 10 months now. This is my second week.

1)
The caregiver does not change my baby's diaper UNLESS she makes a stool.
Now how did I know? I put a black dot on my baby's diaper, after 5hours, I took my baby home and saw the same diaper on her....knowing this is the second time in 2 weeks....

2)
Does not clean around her mouth after she eats. I surprise the caregiver and find out my baby sleeping with LOTS of left over around her lips and chin.:blink:

3)
Poor ventilation and*my baby's clothes smell like oil all the time.

4)
She claims that my baby does not drink or eat when she is with her. Once I drive home, my baby never stops eating.

I started to think and almost believe that she leaves my baby in the basement and does not do a thing... But IGNORE her.

I do not want to send my baby anymore...:unsure::u nsure: I would like to know is there a penalty to pay? Knowing that I must give her a notice 20 days. I do not get any government aid so I am paying the total cost myself.

Please help me.

Have you paid any sort of deposit or any daycare fees in advance? Have you signed a contract? What kind of "oil" does she smell of? If you don't feel like your daughter is safe then you shouldn't send her back!

Some might disagree with me but you have the right to leave immediately and owe nothing. You entered into a contract for care and with that comes obligations of the caregiver. If what you are saying, unchanged diapers, etc. are true then the caregiver has breached the contract and you can void it. I assume you are providing the diapers. Do you do this on a daily basis or did you give the caregiver a full package. In the diaper bag you would be able to count the diapers and food provided.

As far as the eating goes it is very common for a child to refuse to eat for the caregiver until they feel comfortable. The child may be very fussy and not settling in and the provider finds it easier to just leave the child to their own devices rather than deal with the tears. If that were your only complaint I would say give them a chance to learn to like each other but since there are other issues then yes you should take your baby and find a new arrangement.

Have you signed a contract with her? It should state if there is a penalty for pulling out your child. You could argue that your caregiver didn't uphold her end of the agreement as playfelt suggested. If you feel that it's not a safe place that I would highly suggest finding alternate care. And playfelt is right about the food, many children refuse to eat for awhile at daycare, even if they are hungry.

Good luck

I agree with what the others have said. If you do not feel that your child is safe or cared for properly, do not take the risk of leaving her in that situation for even one more day. I agree with Playfelt that if the caregiver is not providing the level of care she agreed to, the contract becomes breeched and you should not have to pay any penalty. Was there any trial period? I have the first month as a trial period during which either the parent or the caregiver can end care with no penalty if things are not working out.

Thank you for all your replies.It made me feel that I made the right decision this morning.

I did not send my baby to the daycare today. And asked the caregiver how often she changes the diaper, she replied by every 2 hours. She told me look I have used some of your huggies ( my diaper ) Which made me smile sarcastically.and comforted her right away... that it has been twice that I take my baby with the same morning diaper. She kept on arguing that she does change her diaper. Now that I told her, I am sure she will change the diaper from now on... But I lost trust. Knowing she is a very nice woman, I can tell she loves kids, plays with them, but being clean is more important.

I singed a contract. It says... I need to give 20 day notice before taking my baby out. I did not make any deposit. My contract does not mention anything about penalty.


Baby love

All I can say is that if you felt you had to mark her diaper then the trust factor is gone and you need to keep her out of this care. Go with your gut on this, I know if it was my baby thats what I would do.

I know your deposit will be a loss, tell her you would like it back. If she doesn't give it back then you will know you were correct regarding her charater. Move on and know you can never put a price on your childs safty!

I know there may be a huge back lash from me saying this, but is it really that bad for a child to go fours hours without being changed? I have daycare children that arrive at 8am and sometimes by 11am they haven't done a poop and and if their diapers still don't feel very heavy with pee I leave them until after lunch. Sometimes they fill their diapers just after having eaten and I think it's a waste of a diaper if it still feels dryish and of course I am going to change them after lunch because I am putting them all down for naps. Now, if I had a child that was leaving at noon, I would most definitely change them so they would have a nice fresh diaper for the journey home. I sometimes change pee diapers after 2 hours. I sometime change pee diapers after 3 hours. I always changed poo diapers immediately. I find it hard to believe that their are parents out there that go out shopping with their child and after 3 hours in Walmart when their child hasn't had a poo, that they wouldn't just put them in their car seat and go home to change them, making it almost four hours or more in that same diaper. I have spoken to other daycare providers about what they do, because when I am at a playgroup with five children in diapers it is hard to get them all into the bathroom to change them. It is much easier to load them all into my wagon and walk home and change them there. I would like to hear what others have to say about this.

DaycareLuLu I agree with you to a point. The original poster didn't say what time she drops off. I have kids dropped off before 7 am. I find that by 9:00 they all need a diaper change based on having had breakfast. Then they would be in that same diaper until naptime unless they pooped. So if the child is dropped off at 7 am then by noon that is 5 hours and includes breakfast and snack. At minimum kids should be changed before lunch so they can sit comfortably - most babies are changed after their morning nap which I assuming since the baby is 10 months old they are probably doing. I do change diapers on kids under a year more often based on when they go down and get up from naps. I don't like kids sitting in a wet diaper because that is when diaper rash is more likely to occur such as to sit for a meal. I would rather change before the meal then do a quick check before nap but it happens right after lunch.

Babylove; I am sorry you had a bad experience with child care. I am glad that you chose not to bring your child anymore, since obviously the trust was gone (or there never was any) and that is CRUCIAL to a good parent-caregiver relationship. Better luck at the next place!!
Now, if I can just weigh in on the debate re: diaper changes.
I completely judge the necessity of changes on the individual child. I have one child that honest to goodness does not require a change until after lunch, before nap. He arrives around 8, so that means over 4 hours in one diaper. But if I change him mid-morning, I am literally changing a dry and clean bum. That seems wasteful to me? Most of the other kids seem to need a change mid-morning, then after naptime, and maybe one more before home time. This, of course, excludes any poopy bums. Those get changed immediately.
My point is; I change bums based on need, not the clock.