Wiping butts

Hi ladies,

Question for you all. Do you go to the bathroom with your kids all the time and wipe for them?

I don't once they are fully trained. I will go if they need me but unless they say something they are on their own. My bathroom is at the top of the stairs from my space. Once I am confident that they can do things by themselves I let them do it.

I got a text last night from my 3.5 year olds mom asking if I wipe her child's bum. My answer was no. She said her child must of had a poop while here and did not wipe properly which resulted in dirty underwear and a red bum. I said unless she asks for help I don't go. Her reply was that she will remind her child to call for me. Now I have no problem helping if needed but I am not going to be running up there with her every time. Also instead of relying on someone to always help her why not try teaching her to do it herself?

Am I wrong here? Should I be checking her every time she goes?

My three year olds wipe themselves and I don't help unless called which is never. I teach wiping as part of toilet training and will check initially but once about 6 months into being trained, they on their own.

I do the same. I had this girl for a year (aged1-2) then they left for a year and then she came back to me in Sept (aged 3). She was fully trained when she returned to me. She was in preschool before coming back and I know they will not help a child in the bathroom at preschool as the requirement is child is trained before they start. I don't mind if she calls me if needed but didn't think it was necessary to run with her every time she goes because she is obviously not telling me.

Like others, teaching how to wipe is taught during potty training but it can sometimes take longer to learn how to properly do it. If they call me or if I smell them, lol, I make sure they are wiped properly. Dried poop is gross and can be sore, no one wants that! Most of mine are nighttime poopers though, lucky me!! :)

I'd apologize to the mom and explain that unless called in, they're on their own once trained. I'd let her know that I'd keep an eye on it for the next little while and encourage the child to tell you when she poops.

Once they turn 3, I stop wiping, unless it's been diarrhea or something.

Yes they need to be trained to be in preschool but they do help if needed. At least in the nursery school I worked at, we did!

I did tell mom I would go if she asks for help. She has been here 8 months and has never asked for help. Mom's texts seemed as if she was annoyed and if I recall I am pretty sure we went through this with her older sibling that I had a few years ago. Mom never said anything about it this morning at drop off so maybe I was reading into it more than I should have. I am glad to know I do the same as everyone.