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I'd probably try to modify the program, personally, as this would be a pretty one off kind of situation. It may be that they cannot take more time because of their job, so I can understand their conundrum. I would likely try to incorporate the surgery and issues surrounding it into the program. It's a great learning experience for the children and can facilitate some great curricula. I had to have a significant surgery to my face for cancer a number of years ago for which I modified my curriculum both pre and post surgery. Before surgery to prepare them for changes to my appearance (during the healing process especially), so we spent a week dealing with that so they wouldn't be frightened when the saw me. And significant changes were made afterward because I was unable to participate in the original program fully, even after 2 weeks of bed rest. My clients appreciated the effort and what could have been a problem ended up being a wonderful learning experience for all the kids - a fine lesson in compassion and empathy as well as a myriad of other areas. Everyone runs their businesses differently, but it might be worth considering changes under the circumstances and it will certainly make parents take notice when they see your ingenuity at incorporating a child's scary experience into your daycare life for the others to learn from.
Ignoring your comment about how they are parents that already 'push the envelope' I feel that a surgery on a child is out of the norm enough to justify some changes. Turn it into a learning opportunity for the group. "Johnny has surgery and can't walk very well so let's help by bringing him a few toys, and going to him to play today".
Can he go in a wagon for your walks?
I wouldn't suggest this for colds and illnesses that are a rather regular occurrence but this is a young child who is having surgery. His family has booked a week off to be home with him. Odds are they can't manage more. Odds are after a week at home he will be thrilled to rejoin his friends, even if he can't quite keep up.
If after trying it out for a few days it really isn't working, then inform them they need to keep him home.
Yes we will use the learning on a cognitive/emotional level for the whole group. That's not the issue. They want the child carried everywhere ie. no walking. We have lot s of stairs to bathroom/bedroom/in and out of house and garage etc. (child is over 50lbs) Yes I can use the stroller if needed. I saw something similar at the centre when I was there, and the child was off for 3 weeks at the supervisor's insistence, due to inability to provide one on one care/carrying etc for a preschool child. We'll see how it goes and what his pain tolerance is like. Thanks for the input.
If the child needed to be carried-they would need alternate care for me. I already have 1 non walker (12mo) and 2 other unsteady ones. I can't carry 4 kids out in a fire. 3 needing assistance is my max. If he could get around with crutches/crawling, then I would consider it. My program is all one level except for getting outside, and I could lift him down the stairs if he was able to hobble/crawl through play time.
I would lean to not having the child in care if they truly can't crawl/hobble about. But, is this really the case? Kids heal quickly and don't really sit still for long...is the child truly going to be immobile and completely dependent?
Obviously there is no way for you to know and if the parents truly believe so they will have to line up alternate care. I suppose I would lay out very VERY clear boundaries for admitting the child into care and leaving it to them to meet those boundaries.
Hopefully by outlining your boundaries they will get the info they need to assess the expected healing time. Parents often over play things related to children so they may be making it seem worse than it is out of parental concern. I ran a girl guide group and one week the mom, in tears, told me a girl wouldn't be back for a while as she was having brain surgery a few days later. I was shocked and sadden and utterly confused when said child showed up next week with dad. When i asked what precautions I needed to make to ensure her safety the dad gave me a weird look and said 'she had tubes put in her ears, don't peg her in the head with a ball and she'll be fine" hahahahah this still cracks me up. This tubes in the ear surgery was common and minor but mom totally saw it as "brain surgery" and was expecting the worst.
I would have them figure things out in their end (by consulting doctors etc) to see if their child can meet your needs! I don't think it is unreasonable to not care for a 3 yr old that needs to be carried everywhere. It's one thing for a parent to do at home, but a whole other thing for a caregiver of multiple needy children to do!