Delicate toileting issue

I have a child almost 4 years in my care that gets recurring infections in his "member"
The parents have brought him in several times with the infection and swelling. He is fully toilet trained and normally completely independent in the bathroom. The parents are expecting me to apply antibiotic cream to the area and assist him in holding the affected part while he urinates. This is beyond my comfort level given his age. My feeling is that if he can't participate in all aspects of the day, then he should remain home. Parents are home in the summer, so not going to put them in conflict with going to work if he stayed home a few days til the infection clears. Any thoughts if I'm being unrealistic in my expectations? Would you do the cream when it is all swollen/ infected? I'm definitely not holding"it" sorry for the graphic details lol! Please help!!

Ya, for your own child sure. For a 4yr old not related to you it is definitely more awkward. Especially if you have other children in care watching you who then go home and report it (in a casual kid kind of way).

How long does the cream need to be applied? I would have them keep him home.

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Originally Posted by Busy ECE mommy

I have a child almost 4 years in my care that gets recurring infections in his "member"
The parents have brought him in several times with the infection and swelling. He is fully toilet trained and normally completely independent in the bathroom. The parents are expecting me to apply antibiotic cream to the area and assist him in holding the affected part while he urinates. This is beyond my comfort level given his age. My feeling is that if he can't participate in all aspects of the day, then he should remain home. Parents are home in the summer, so not going to put them in conflict with going to work if he stayed home a few days til the infection clears. Any thoughts if I'm being unrealistic in my expectations? Would you do the cream when it is all swollen/ infected? I'm definitely not holding"it" sorry for the graphic details lol! Please help!!

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I would do the cream. To me that no different that apply diaper rash cream. I would not hold his penis while he peeing. Why can't he sit down to pee? If you turn him to face the back of toilet (reverse of normal), then he has more space. This what I done in past with toilet training boys who have very small penis because they can lean forward more and urine go into bowl better.

If parent not on board with him sitting to pee, then yes, I think he should be home. It not appropriate to hold the penis of 4 year old child unless you parent.

Last month I had a 4yo with the same issue. I had to apply the cream mid day (they did the others at home). He was still able to go independently all the other times. I might watch/assist the child one time to help him find a comfortable method-that's it.

I should clarify that it's not just holding the penis, as he does sit to pee, but they want me to retract the foreskin each time he pees. I said no. I feel like this is asking way too much, and puts me at risk for a CAS visit for abuse.

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Originally Posted by Busy ECE mommy

I should clarify that it's not just holding the penis, as he does sit to pee, but they want me to retract the foreskin each time he pees. I said no. I feel like this is asking way too much, and puts me at risk for a CAS visit for abuse.

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I would handle this situation the same way as Suzie said. I wonder if these reoccurring infections are caused by them either A) pulling his skin back or B) them telling him to. The foreskin of a child should never be pulled back until it is ready to come back which isn't typically until puberty and quite often not until 18 years old. The risk of infection is high for people not following these very guidelines. I think it's likely what is causing it. Nobody should be pulling it back infection or not. If he comes to daycare, toilet him sat down in reverse and don't worry about their request to pull the skin back. In all likelihood, this will cause more problems.