Apparently, I have MUG written on my forehead!!

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Originally Posted by mimi

Sometimes the minor things can pile up. I have some parents that do a 15 second drop off - no time to chat- then arrive at closing and then they have all the time to chat about themselves - on my time. Also, -now you've got me going lol, I give my kids birthday and Christmas presents as I think they are great. I spend about 20.00 on each child. I have yet, in 6 years been thanked by a parent. When I prompt them by asking if Johnny liked his truck, I get a blank stare and then a lame thanks. These examples are just to let you know you are not alone my dear. I think though, in any business which deals with the public directly, there will be alot of examples of rude behavior. People are too self involved to be considerate. Hope you have a good day!

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Agree totally with what you said about gifts and not getting even a thank you. I've stopped spending MY money on things like that now. Those are out of pocket expenses that deserve at least a simple thank you. Same for mother's and father's day. I used to spend a fortune doing awesome crafts and gifts for the kids to give only to find them smashed in pieces in the bottom of the diaper bag, or dropped down my driveway on their way home...they didn't appreciate them, so I stopped doing them. Sad that it comes to that.

I have such a hard time being 'mean' and making the parents stick to my rules..but...it has to change because they just walk all over you when you don't and then you start to resent them and it makes you not want to get up and do your job. The days are already long enough that if you don't want to get up and work it makes it even harder.

This very minute I"m writing up an email to all my families to remind them of the rules (had a parent text 2 hours AFTER their scheduled drop off time to say they decided to stay home with dck today...and the rest of us have sat here inside all morning waiting for her to be dropped off) the little things like that add up so fast...

Empathy ladies - this is why my client handbook has evolved to be 18 pages long ... because of all those little 'minor details' that make my day run smooth needing to be ironed out before they start care to avoid conflict in care!

I like my crew here by 9am ... if you are going to be late or have an appointment you prearrange that before hand or you risk that you arrive to an empty house - the other 4 children do not deserve to be left 'waiting' on someone who has not bothered to call and give a heads up they slept in or that they have an appointment or so forth ASAP before your normal drop off time ... them being late is NOT MY PROBLEM and should not have a negative impact on the others in the program. I have a cellphone and clients can find us if they show up late - does not take that happening more than once and THEM being even later in turn for them to GET IT that respect is a two way street - had you had the respect to CALL I would have had the respect to either wait if this is a 'rare' thing for that client or let you know where to find us so you could drive straight there if you make a habit of 'being late' for morning drop off cause well even if you call I am not going to stop my program for you constantly - you get one freebie once in a blue moon ;)

I also agree about the 'small above and beyond' things we do often going unappreciated by clients .. I prefer to remind myself that I do not do those things for the ADULTS I do them for the CHILD ... I only do gifts when it is a seasonal thing that everyone is getting so no child is left out - so do not do 'birthday' gifts their party here is my 'gift' but with Xmas, Valentines, Easter, Halloween if I give the crew a 'special something' to celebrate I get the thank you right away from the CHILD at least cause we open it HERE and well they are 'taught' to say thank you in my program .... if the parent does not also say 'thank you' well it is a shame their parent raised them up to be rude but at least we might be breaking the cycle with their children ;)

With Mother's Day and Fathers Day and so forth again making those things with the children is about the 'process' for me not the end result for the parent ... the joy and excitement of the child to be creating a 'gift' for their parent and the look on their face when they give them that at pick up ... what happens to it after they leave here and if the parent appreciates it is well just 'bonus'.... all of my clients to date have always been very 'appreciative' so I am lucky ... although I do have one client enrolled whose kid has broken everything that has been sent home but I still do them with their child because it was a 'gift' and well it is theirs to do with what they want if they see more value in allowing the kid to 'play with it' than keeping it as a keepsake that is their choice ... I try to keep my gifts to under $5/child in materials and they would replace any normal creative art we do each week so it is not costing me 'more' to do presents for the parents it is just 'redirecting' my creative art budget to a gift with purpose opposed to open ended exploration ;)

WOW!! are you sure you're not in my daycare cause that sounds ALOT like most of my parents.

what I do is send out a monthly letter to all parents. For what ever reason comes up that month.
i.e if your having problems with a parents with pickup time. Just send a letter out (not directed to 1 parent) but rather to everyone to say that you would prefer for all kids being there no later then 8:00 am so everyone can be on the same scehdule (YOURS) also put in the letter how much you appriciate everyone cooperation, bla bal bla...
and for drop off I never assume parents will be on time (cause lets face it---there NOT) I assume that they will be picking up by 5:15pm (my closeing) and when a certain parents is late 3,4,5,6 times (lol) i send out this reminder letter about MY closing time...

Oh I love this vent! I also have a family who, although they are never late, use all of their time when I know the mom gets of work at 3:15 and goes home to cook dinner before they come to get the kids. Their kids are the first to arrive in the morning and the last to leave in the evening. I have given them notice that their pick-up time is changing from 5:30 to 5pm as of September (everyone else picks up by 5) and they complained a bit, but said they will do it. I always remind myself that I did it to myself by setting my hours the way I did, but I relaly don't think I would mind so much if I knew that they couldn't get here before 5:30 due to work...knowing that they are at home or out having a coffee etc is hard...especially when they other kids leave and these little ones start clinging to me and asking for mama :( It makes me sad to to think that they go home eat dinner and go to bed...spending all of an hour with their parents. They are lovely, sweet boys, but tend to be clingy and I think this is the reason. In future, I will stick to hours I can handle even if I know the parents are doing their own thing...that way I won't feel like this! By the way...20 minutes late because of a soccer game ?!!!! I would definitely be charging late fees for that!

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Originally Posted by 11 years experience

WOW!! are you sure you're not in my daycare cause that sounds ALOT like most of my parents.

what I do is send out a monthly letter to all parents. For what ever reason comes up that month.
i.e if your having problems with a parents with pickup time. Just send a letter out (not directed to 1 parent) but rather to everyone to say that you would prefer for all kids being there no later then 8:00 am so everyone can be on the same scehdule (YOURS) also put in the letter how much you appriciate everyone cooperation, bla bal bla...
and for drop off I never assume parents will be on time (cause lets face it---there NOT) I assume that they will be picking up by 5:15pm (my closeing) and when a certain parents is late 3,4,5,6 times (lol) i send out this reminder letter about MY closing time...

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IMO and IME this doesn't work. This was always my approach, not wanting to offend people or cause an unpleasent atmosphere with the parents but I'm just realizing that by doing this, I am part of the problem. If it isn't dealt with, by the book with my policies and consequences stated in my contract being enforced the first time, then I'm in effect causing it to go on. Bear in mind, lol, this is an area I am having HUGE struggles with, as all of my issues surrounding this kind of thing are with families who are repeat multiple offenders who Ive had for close to 2 years, so its easier said than done changing this passive way of functioning along with the need to please people. Not good at all. I am however trying to break this by not being as passive about it anymore and changing my ways. Its funny how myself, and you 11 years.... and so many other providers don't seem to want to upset these parents when they clearly have a complete disregard for our feelings, our business and our home life when they pick up late and don't give a rats arse about it. I shouldn't have to send reminders out left right and centre, especially repeatedly. If they were able to comprehend my contract when they signed up for my services, they are clearly smart enough to understand and retain information, so it's got nothing to do with, not having the capacity to retain this info, they are simply, not respectful people IMO.

OOooo, I should definitley work on practising what I preach LOL I seem to know it all, but can't put any of it in to place haha. I'm working on it ladies and I will let you know how I get on.

The late pick up - he would get immediately terminated if he picked up late when he was OFF work and enjoying leisure pursuits on MY TIME. It is ONE thing to be stuck in a traffic jam due to an unforseen accident (and even then you only get a ONE STRIKE thing from me) but quite another to be at a bar while your kids sits in daycare after closing time.

You know what I am gonna say................. .............NEXT!