How does a "new parent" know more than me?

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Originally Posted by apples and bananas

My advise is to give as little info as possible to her at pick up.

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EXACTLY!!!

If you've tried things 'your way' for a few days and still nothing has changed and you are TRULY concerned then bring it up to her (but act like it's new information LOL) otherwise......whate ver!
I have a 3yr who's parents say she doesn't need naps anymore. She naps here for over 2hrs everyday and the one day I tried it the PARENTS way by 2pm she ASKED ME to go nap!!!!!!!!! :yes: so parents assume I'm not napping her so they don't ask at P/U...and I don't tell. We're BOTH happy :D

She has had issues all along with the spit up, they have tried low iron formula, she is now on a low iron and easy to digest formula, plus I had suggested her to be on infant water as well. (we live in the country and have well water) our water does have extra iron in it amoung other minerals. She hessitated at first stating the water was expensive, they had tried it and it seemed a little better but due to the extra expense went to a filter system. I offered to buy the baby water, THEN she showed up the next day with 3 bottles. (control?) I do think it is a typical case of wanting to be at home with your child but HAVING to work. But heres my opinion, (dont mean it to be harsh) but the truth is: you chose to go to work, so you NEED to trust someone else completely! You cant be in complete control when you are at work all day, its hard to swallow for a working mommy who loves her child sooooo much, but you do have to let go of the reins a little and trust that your child is ok with out you. Just something that is hard for so many first time parents, or control freak parents.
I was asked to feed her every 3 hours today....mom was a little upset that the baby was up every 3 hours last night for a bottle. (i do think they think Im not feeding her enough through the day) yesterday I DID feed her every three hours, she puked ALL DAY and cried ALOT! when mom picked her up, she threw up twice standing at the door. AND this baby is clearly NOT underfed, chunky cheeks, chunky body. I will feed her every three hours ON THE DOT!!! moms specifications!!!!!! :) smile and wave boys! smile and wave!:wave:

totally get the not telling everything!!!! I have had parents ask me to cut the kids nap OR not have them nap at all because they are not going to bed well at night. I do try to meet in the middle, I will cut the nap shrter or have them nap earlier but if it goes against what I feel the child needs....I dont give two sh$%s! about the parents not having a great night because they couldnt put their kid to bed at 7 and watch their favorite shows!!!!!! I will do what I think is best for the child, thats my job!!!!

My pet peeve are the ones who say 'well, he/she is an only child' and I respond with 'every child who has been in my daycare has been an only child' so I don't find that an excuse. Different issues arise with the children at different times and we have to deal with them and help the families through the stages one at a time. But if the parents are working against you, forget it, you won't make progress and you are in for 3 years with stress and unhappiness.

I have always wished there was a free day every year: (like a holiday) that you could just speak your mind be totally honest or just do what you think in your head. There are some parents I would love to just grab by the shoulders and say "wake up!!!!!! listen to me!!!!!!! you dont know everything!!!" or just look at them, smile, then slap them right across the face! ha ha one can dream of such "free will" :laugh::laugh::laugh :

well, time to get bottle #1, almost to the 3 hour mark! wish me luck....and my carpet!!! ha

Can you feed her in the kitchen area then sit her up in a baby chair while she digests it and that saves your carpets and furniture ? If she throws up all day doing it this way then maybe she is getting too much food, if you think that's the case then do it your way and tell her your doing it her way .... If she thinks it's being done her way you'd be amazed how much the child will sleep .... ; )

she spits up for hours after a bottle. it just changes consistancy after so long. :)
I have found laying her flat or on a slight incline works best. If i forget and hold her by her tummy on my hip, spew!!!! or if someone picks her up too soon after bottle and holds her up right, spew!!! if she rolls over, spew!!!!! I do find that just plain leaving her alone for an hour or so is best no matter what position she is in, if you move her around is ussualy when it comes up. I do keep her on her own little floor gym that has a fabric back so when she spits up i just wipe it, then wash every week. She's like a little "puke-fountain" ha ha ha

It sounds like it could be reflux. They may need to change the formula if it's milk based.

REFLUX

WHAT IT IS: Baby heartburn, sometimes accompanied by Vomiting. In extreme cases, there can be complications and the baby can regurgitate blood-tinged liquid. Heartburn is extremely painful in adults, and worse for babies because they don’t know what is happening. When your baby eats, food goes into the mouth and down the oesophagus. If the digestive system is working properly, the sphincter—the muscle that opens and closes the stomach allows the food to drop in and keeps it there. If the gastrointestinal tract is fully developed, there’s a rhythmic pattern of swallowing, and then the sphincter opening and closing as it should. But with reflux, the sphincter is immature and doesn’t close properly after opening. The food doesn’t stay down and, to make it worse, stomach acid comes up with it, burning your baby’s oesophagus.

WHAT TO LOOK FOR: One or more episodes of spitting up should not alarm you. All babies have reflux at one time or another, especially after eating. Some have it more often, and some infants are simply more sensitive tO digestive issues. When I suspect reflux I first ask: Was he breach? Did he have the cord wrapped around his neck during delivery? Was he premature? Was he jaundiced? Was he a low-birthweight baby? Did Mum have a C-section? Have any of the adults or other children in the family had reflux? A yes to any of those questions points to a higher chance of reflux. If she has reflux, your baby will have trouble getting through her feeds. She might splutter and choke, because her sphincter has stayed shut, making it impossible for her to get food down in the first place. Or, she might spit up or even projectile-vomit a few minutes after eating, because the sphincter didn’t close once the food went down.

Sometimes you’ll also see a watery cottage-cheese spit~up as long as an hour after a feed, because the stomach is in spasm and whatever is on top comes back up through the oesophagus. She might have explosive poos. Like a windy baby, she might also gulp air, but with reflux the gulp is accompanied by a little squeaky noise. Reflux babies are often hard to burp. Another key sign is that the only way they feel comfortable is when they’re sitting up or are held upright on a shoulder. Any attempts to lay them down result in bouts of hysterical crying, which is why a red flag goes off in my brain when a parent tells me, “He’s happiest when sitting in the swing” or “He’ll only go to sleep in his car seat.”

The vicious cycle with oesophageal reflux is that the more tense a baby is and the more crying he does, the more likely it is that he’ll have a spasm and that the acid will conic up his oesophagus and make him even more uncomfortable. You try every trick in the book and nothing calms him. Chances are, you’re trying the wrong tricks . You may tend to jiggle him up and down to comfort him, which only helps the acid move up the oesophagus. Or you’ll think, needs to burp,” so you pat his back, which also pushes the acid up through his, undeveloped sphincter. You might attribute his crying and his discomfort to this or that—usually colic or wind—with-out realising he has heartburn, which requires a very specific kind of management. You get confused and abandon your routine because you’re having trouble reading his cues. Meanwhile, your baby is exhausted. He gets hungry again from all that crying (which takes a lot of energy), So you try to feed him again. But before you know it, he’s uncomfortable, maybe spitting up, and the cycle continues.

WHAT TO DO: If your pediatrician says it’s colic, get a second opinion from a pediatric gastroenterologist, especially if the adults in your family or other children, have gastrointestinal problems. Reflux runs in families.

Often a health history and thorough examination is enough to diagnose the problem.. Most babies are diagnosed without lab tests. In extreme cases or if your doctor thinks there might be complications from your child’s reflux, various tests may be performed - X-ray with a barium swal¬low, ultrasound, endoscopy, esophageal pH study. The specialist will determine if your baby has reflux, gauge its severity, and can usually esti¬mate how long your baby’s reflux will last. She will also give you medica¬tions and guidelines to manage it.

The most common treatment for reflux is medication: baby antacids and relaxants. That part is in the doctor’s hands. But there are also things YOU can do besides taking him for rides in the car or getting him addicted to that darn mechanical swing:

Elevate the cot mattress. Raise it to a 45-degree angle by using a baby wedge or a couple of books—anything, as long as the head is higher. Babies with reflux do best when propped up and swaddled.

Do not pat your baby when burping him. If yOU pat you’ll make him vomit or he’ll start crying, which starts the vicious cycle. Rather, gently rub in a circular motion on the left side of his back. The reason to rub is that if you pat his back, which is where his oesophagus is, it irritates an already inflamed area. Rub upward with baby’s arm straight over your shoulder so there’s a clear passage up the oesophagus. If after three mm-utes, he doesn’t burp, stop burping him. If there’s air in there, he’ll start being fussy. Gently lift him forward and the air will probably come out.

Pay attention to feeds. Avoid overfeeding your baby or feeding him too quickly (which is more likely to happen on a bottle). If a bottle-feeding takes less than twenty minutes, the hole in the nipple may be too large. Switch to a slow-release nipple. If he starts fussing after a feed, use a dummy to calm him rather than feed again, which will only make him more distressed.

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