Ever termed because unable to transition?

I had a 12 month old dcg a few years ago that only lasted a couple of weeks. She would cry all the time, so much that she would make herself throw up. I tried to console her, but nothing would work. The other poor dcks were miserable as well, listening to her day in and day out. I ended up just being honest with the dcm and told her that things just weren't working out and that she would have to find alternate care.
I felt like such a failure at the time, but as I look back, I realize that it was out of my control. Either they fit or they don't.

I think I may have to let this one go-it is too stressful on the other children and myself.

I can't do it. I also don't think it's fair to the child trying to transition, or to the other kids in your care.

I have told the parents why (crying all day) they are being termed and that I don't think that their child is ready for group care. They have all been understanding. Once was after two weeks and once was after 2 days!

If you can't handle it, you can't handle it. There is nothing wrong with that.

Thanks nschildcare-I am feeling like a big failure :(

It's a TOUGH part of the job, because you don't want to give up on a crying child but at the same time it's so grating and impacts the day so much!
I had a 4 yrs old that I termed after 2 months of crying all day...and it was extra annoying because she was 4..not a baby. It was awkward because it was my neighbour's little girl but oh well, the other kids hated it when she came!

Do not feel like a failure! Remember you have ALL the kids to look out for not just the one. If one child is not working and it is disrupting the whole group then the one has to go. I was worried about all the other parents pulling their child and I didn't want that!! Just think what is best for you and the group and go with it!

I too had an experience 2 years ago that lasted way too long, close to a year. The only reason I held off so long was because my heart went out to her mom who was on her own. She had an adorable 8 month old that spent 1 week with mom and 1 week with dad. When she was with mom, she came to me, the week with dad, grandma would watch her. At first I thought she needed time to transition. She ate and slept for me just fine, every other time she would cry, wanted to be held and it only got worse. I would talk to the mom and we couldn't figure it out. I would just ignore it, but it got to a point where I couldn't handle it anymore. The crying got louder and as the months went by she started hitting the other kids, she would only be happy if i had her on my lap and paid attention to her. Once I walked a foot away the crying would start. The following week with grandma would be fine! When her week would come for me to watch her, my mood would just go downhill, I couldn't do crafts or even enjoy my other kids. It got really bad. I than decided I needed to terminate. Mom was a mess, but I was loosing my mind. The only conclusion I came up with was she didn't want to have other children with her. She needed a 1 on 1 environment. Mom finally found someone to watch her and only her. From what I know she was doing well with this lady, whom I don't think was even into daycare, but it broke my heart that when they left, mom just stopped talking to me. I felt so used !!!

Well, I really appreciate all the support! And it sure is a very HARD part of the job! I have to say though that your all support really makes me feel like I can handle it.

I have termed because of failure to transition. I had a little boy from 6.5 months til 9
Months, 3 days per week. The poor kid cried and screamed bloody murder all day every day no matter what I tried -feeding, diaper changes, naps, walks, toys, change of scenery, holding. Didn't matter. He was like that for everyone but dad. I tried my best, but couldn't deal with it in the end. Hard to do but made life better.

I have let a few kids go, over the years, who would not settle in. In fact, between 2012 and 2013 I let three kids go for this reason. It was a bad year for screamers. And, NO, I am not talking about normal transitional crying for a few weeks. I'm referring to SCREAMING for 7 or 8 weeks that got to the point of utter ridiculousness. And for EVERY one of those kids I termed the parents were doing stupid shit at home that was not conducive to setting their child up to be successful in group care.

It is RARELY the kid but the parent that is the problem.