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How about turning the table on mum and face to face or at the very least over the phone...I hate texting stuff like this....ask her how she suggests you curb this behaviour. It's not you taking orders, or her being your boss, this is about putting her on the spot and coming at her from a different angle. If she thinks your suggestions are no good or aren't worth her time then make her think she is in the drivers seat making the call. Obviously you can dispel any ridiculous suggestions with an explanation along the lines of "In my experience...." This may prevent her from being so defensive and she may change her tune. She can't possibly think that no action of any kind shouldn't be taken????
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Ewww !!!! Seriously ?? I think I would term !! How could you ever get things cleaned enough ?? After the first time I would prob nap her where I could keep an eye on her ! I would rather deal with a cranky child then that !! I am imagining the only pjs that would work backwards would be zippered ? I am so grossed out lol !!!
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what about the pull-ups that don't open on the sides - just for nap OR - OK this might seem like an odd solution but what about duct tape? every day before nap go around her diaper with one long piece of duct tape (making sure you only get it on the diaper and not on her skin). She wouldn't be able to open her diaper lol. I have never done this to anyone but I can guarantee I would not be impressed with any child that got poop everywhere!
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I have never had to deal with this myself but had a friend who had to duct tape her daughter's diaper on at nap and bedtime. It's a pain for sure but better than dealing with a poopy mess!! And I agree with the other posters about giving mom some responsibility for helping you out here.
