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Thanks. I appreciate the kind words. I know how anxiety is...prime example over here, but I am keeping it in check because I don't want him to get worked up seeing me all worked up. I can totally understand his feelings because I have been there. I think some help with coping is definitely what he needs. And without a doubt the school has to do their part to help squash the 'conflict' with the other kids.
A really good book I've used is"what to do when you worry too much. A kids guide to overcoming anxiety"
So i have come back to resurrect this thread because we have gotten to know more about what's going on, and i will take any advice i can get. My son still doesn't want to go to school, doesn't want to go to stay with his grandparents, doesn't want to go swimming lessons and is acting up at home. He continues to say that the one particular child is 'bullying him' at school- his words. we have had a few discussions with the child and youth worker, social worker, principal and his teacher. I am not really happy with the way things are going. I feel like he isn't being taken seriously. I feel like when i call, my concerns are being down played. Plus, i feel like i am not being filled in with what is going on at school. the initial cause of the problem may seem trivial to you or i but it's evolved to become serious enough that my son doesn't want to go to school EVERY DAY! when your kid wakes up before 7am and cries off and on all morning about not wanting to go to school, then puts up up a huge fuss at the school or bus, you know its serious. He says this kid comes to find him no matter where he is. He says he is being pushed, shoved, 'rough handled', Due to privacy laws, they can't divulge if/how the other child is being disciplined, by according to my 7 year old, no one is doing anything for him because the 'bullying' is still happening. The principal says "everyone in this situation is getting the support they need", which i guess is supposed to mean that he is being dealt with. I also asked he about the anti-bullying measures that they have in place and she told me to read the newsletters. doesn't really help me too much.
Oh to be a fly on the wall... So much for a "Bully Free zone' and "zero Tolerance Policy"
I am truly sorry to hear all of this is happening to you and your son. Something similar happened to my daughter in grade 4 and well , if the principal isn't on side and there isn't a zero tolerance policy enforced by the principal, then it's like talking to a brick wall. All the while, your son who is at the centre of all this is left dealing with the consequences.Quote:
Originally Posted by MonkeyPrincess
My recommendation to you if you are not happy with how this is being dealt with is to call your schools super intendant and demand an in person meeting with them, the principal and home room teacher. If they continue to insist they are doing all they can, be clear in advocating for your son by making it loud and clear that they are failing your son and that their methods are not working. File a written complaint and be sure to always leave a paper trail. Principals do not like the superintendents being dragged into it but it sounds like that's the next move.
Resolution came for my daughter because she had already been accepted to the French immersion program, late entry in grade 5, so was moving schools, however this group of girls were also going. I called ahead and spoke with the new principal explaining what had been going on and how the principal wasn't willing to call the kids parents or disclose any details to me. The confidentiality thing is BS. Fast forward a few months and one if these girls purposely tripped my daughter up on the bus. I called the principal who reported back to me 24 hours later that this girl had been given a warning and should any single event occur during school hours, on the bus or walking home that she was present at, she would lose bus privileges for the rest of the school year. This really showed me that this anti bullying/zero tolerance policy is BS. It's at the principals discretion and it's really frustrating that they don't all follow one set of board enforced rules. I regularly feel belittled by school administrators whenever I have a concern. It seems like they all stick up for each other and point the finger at the parents. This principal gave me hope and I cherish every amazing teacher who is a part of my kids life and count the seconds when we get a crappy one.
I would think that they would be able to buddy your son up with someone on his bus and for recess' if only for a short time to offer him some reassurance that he is not alone. Where the hell are all the teachers and those on recess duty keeping an eye on these kids. With a report on bullying, you'd have thought they would be keeping a closer eye. Put your foot down and keep on their case. Good Luck
You are darn right i am not giving up ;) I have also spoken to my son about standing up for himself, and walking away, and using his words, getting his friends to stand up for him, hanging out with older kids getting involved in other activities and anything else i can think of. I have tried to talk to my son about how people are different, and maybe the child doesn't realize he is being hurtful, maybe he has special needs and he doesn't realize he hurts sometimes. My son says the boy isn't special needs and he totally understands that he is upsetting him and purposely seeks my son out. This morning he was losing it and I went to the office because i had to go, i was already late getting back home for my DCK's. Plus, i wanted them to see how he gets all worked up about going to school. my daughter's teacher took him for me, thankfully because i had tears in my eyes and she took care of him so i could go....stress, i am telling you....